You're My Rock
by longliveFinchel
Summary: Being newlyweds, Finn and Rachel Hudson are living the life that they've always dreamed. With their new dream house, their great careers, and their bright and bold future on their minds, nothing can stop them. What will happen when they receive unexpected news, changing their lives for the worst. A/U
1. Chapter 1

**Enjoy! :) Disclaimer: I do not own Glee or any of the characters.**

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Prologue

Slowly opening her eyes to the bright light shining through the curtains in her bedroom, she looked at her clock to see what time it was. The clock said 6:54 am, which gave Rachel about six more minutes to sleep. Deciding that she wasn't really that tired anymore, Rachel quietly turned off her alarm, and gently scooted herself out of bed, trying not to wake up the peacefully sleeping figure on the side of her.

Getting out of bed, Rachel felt like the whole entire house was on ice. Which was normal, since it was in the middle of January and she liked the heater turned off at night so she could snuggle under her covers and feel the amazing feeling of warmth. Walking over to the master bathroom, Rachel grabbed her robe, hanging on the door, and quietly made her way downstairs to the kitchen. After fixing a pot of coffee, Rachel made her way over to the island in her kitchen, turning on the small TV that rested on the counter. Turning on the news and seeing that the sports news was on, she quickly changed the channel to cartoons on Disney. Even though she was 24 years old and considered a grown adult, she still enjoyed watching them on Saturday mornings, just like she did when she was 6 years old.

Walking over to the coffee pot, Rachel poured the liquid into a glass mug, added creamer and lots of sugar. This was the absolute part of Saturday mornings. This was her normal routine every Saturday and Sunday morning. She would get up at 7:00 am, fix breakfast, go for an hour long run, take a shower, and spend the rest of the day either doing chores or being lazy. It depended on her mood. Then she would cook dinner, and be in bed for 11:00 pm. She had a very organized style of life. She could admit that she was a little OCD, but she liked it, and it always kept her on her feet.

Heating the skillet on the stove with a small margarine of butter melting away on it, Rachel gathered all of the ingredients to make her favorite breakfast, pancakes. After about 6 pancakes made, Rachel took two separate plates out of the cabinet, and placed three pancakes on each plate. Before she could make her way over to the fridge for butter and syrup, Rachel was taken off guard by two muscular arms wrapping themselves around her body.

"Looks like someone finally decided to get out of bed, Mr. Lazy bones!" She said turning around to face her husband's very sexy half awake, half asleep smile.

"Good morning, gorgeous." He replied leaning down for a kiss.

Wrapping him into a very loving embrace, Rachel gave him a very passionate kiss on the lips. They then found themselves in the exact same position a few minutes later. Finally running out of breath, Rachel pulled away and smiled at him.

"I love waking up to that!" Finn said while giving her a small giggle. "What smells so good?" He asked hugging her from behind, as she coated their pancakes with butter, syrup, and blueberries. Finn's blueberries were shaped to make the pancake look like a smiley face. That was one of the many things that Rachel loved about her husband. No matter how old they got, he would always act like a child. Sometimes it got frustrating, but that was because Finn didn't really see life as this big serious mess that she did. He once told her that "Life is too short to be serious." Sometimes Rachel believed that that was the smartest thing he's ever told her. He had a mind of his own, which made Rachel more inspired because he saw the world in a bright and creative way. That was one of the many things that got Rachel to fall absolutely head over heels for him.

"Your favorite. Pancakes!" she said motioning for him to take the stool next to her, at the counter. He followed.

"Oh wow, you even got the blueberries just the way I like them. Thanks babe." He said sounding surprised.

"What can I say? I'm just that awesome!" She said giggling at her cocky manner.

"Yes you are." He smiled and gave her a kiss on the cheek.

"So, since you got up at like 8:30, I'm guessing that you had an amazing sleep?" Rachel asked nudging him playfully with her elbow.

"I did, actually. I had the best dream. It was about us." He said smiling into her brown eyes.

"Really? What about us?" She asked looking deep into his eyes.

"Well, we were both like really old and we were sitting on a front porch watching our grandchildren run around in the front yard." Finn said placing his hand over hers.

"Aww. I wish I could've seen it." She said resting her head against his shoulder.

"You will one day." He replied, wrapping his arms around her shoulder and pulling her closer to his side.

After they were both finished with breakfast, Rachel placed both of their plates in the dishwasher, and made her way upstairs to get dressed for her run. After placing her IPhone and ear buds in the pocket of her jacket, Rachel made her way back downstairs, to grab her water bottle and kiss Finn goodbye, before she made her way out of the front door.

"I'm heading out. I have my cellphone on me. If theirs anything that you need, call me. I love you baby." She said kissing him on the lips.

"I love you too. Be careful." He said standing outside with her, in his pajamas.

"I will. See you later, alligator." She replied with a giggle.

"After while, crocodile." Finn replied joining in on her giggles. "Have a nice run!" He called after her.

"I will!" She called back, and then she was gone.

After about 25 minutes of running up and down the neighborhood, Rachel stopped when she heard her music stop playing, her ringtone taking it's place. Looking at the caller id, she quickly answered it, seeing that it was her husband.

"Hello?" She asked with a bit of worry in her voice. He never called her during her run.

"Rach. You need to get back to the house. It's not good.." Finn said as soon as she answered. Now Rachel was completely freaking out. Finn's voice sounded terrible and serious. He never sounded like that unless something bad happened.

"Okay. I'll be right there." She replied and hung up her phone. Placing it back in her pocket, she turned back in the direction of her house and ran as fast as she could, until she finally arrived in the driveway. Walking through the front door, Rachel was greeted by Finn, with a terrible look on his face.

"Finn what is it?" She asked getting closer to him.

"It's your mom." He replied.

From there, Rachel's heart fell to the ground. She knew nothing good was going to come from the next sentence.

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**So, here is my new story. I really hope that you will all like it. Please let me know what you think! :)**


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

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"It's your mom."

Looking at him with terror in her face, she slowly walked up closer to him and asked "What's wrong with my mom?", waiting for the truth to come out. Thinking to herself, she realized that these next few seconds in her life could change her forever.

"The hospital just called the house phone. They said that she collapsed at around 7:30 this morning. How about you go get dressed and I'll start up the car?" Finn said grabbing the keys from the key holder.

"Is it okay if I go by myself?" Rachel asked throwing her coat over her running clothes.

"Oh, yeah, sure." Finn replied with a saddened expression.

"I love you for offering to bring me. It's just that it might be nothing, so I don't want to make a big deal out of it until we know for sure what's going on." She said grabbing her keys from the counter.

"Promise you'll tell me as soon as you get home?" He asked looking down at her with a concerned look on his face.

"I promise." She said wrapping her arms around him. "I love you." She said as she got on her tippy toes and placed a kiss on Finn's lips before she turned around and almost ran to her car.

"Be careful! We don't need another hospitalization!" He called after her.

"I promise!" She called back before closing the door to the car, and driving out of their driveway in her newly washed Toyota Camry.

When Rachel arrived at the hospital, she wasn't exactly sure what to do. She was never in this situation before, well, besides the time when she was seven, and her mother took her, and her two older sisters, Haley and Amy, to the hospital, to visit her ill father, who unfortunately passed away from cancer a year later.

Looking around the entrance, Rachel decided to ask the blonde nurse sitting at the front desk if she knew where her mother was.

"Hi, my name is Rachel Hudson, my mom, Shelby Berry was placed in this hospital this morning. I was wondering if you could possibly tell me where I might be able to find her. Sorry, I kind of don't know what I'm doing. I'm just really freaking out right now and I don't know what's going on... I'm sorry, I'm just really scared." She told the nurse, holding her chest, her heart was beating really fast. She was also shaking. It was bad.

"It's okay. Hold on tight for just one moment while I check and see. My name is Terry by the way, don't worry, I've been in the exact same situation with my dad." She replied while typing on her computer.

"Thank you so much, Terry." She replied waiting for an answer.

"Okay, Shelby Berry is in room 345." Terry said looking up at her confused face.

"Could you possibly explain where that is or me?" Rachel asked in a polite tone.

"Take that elevator right there to the third floor, and if you take a right when getting off the elevator, it should be a few doors down." She replied while motioning the directions with her hands.

"Thank you so much for everything." Rachel called behind her before quickly walking to the opened elevator. Hitting the 3rd floor button, she impatiently waited for it to stop at her destination. Hearing it stop, the doors opened, Rachel quickly ran to her right, following the nurse's instructions. Finally finding room 345, Rachel opened the door, and saw her mother laying in the hospital bed with her two sisters sitting on each side.

"Mom.." Rachel said running over to the bed. "Are you okay? I came as soon as I could. What's going on?" She asked in a panicked tone, seeing Haley and Amy's expressions.

Sitting at the table and eating a sandwich, it was now 12:45, and Finn was watching ESPN on the TV in the kitchen. This was definitely Finn's favorite part of Saturdays. He liked the fact that he could just sit around all day in his pajamas and watch TV all day. That's why he looked forward to the weekends.

Hearing the front door close, Finn quickly got up and went towards the living room to hear the news. Making his way into the living room, he was greeted with Rachel, who had tears falling from her face. From there, Finn knew that she had received bad news.

"What's wrong baby?" He asked getting closer to her, trying to read her emotionless face. She was pale, and it looked like she could pass out at any moment.

"It's.. It's my mom... Sh.. sh.. she's sick.." Rachel stuttered trying to get the words out through her sobs.

Walking over to her, Finn pulled her in close to him, allowing her to cry into his chest. He didn't want to ask her anything else, but he wasn't really sure what she meant by "she's sick". By the crying he knew it wasn't good, but he still didn't know what was going on. Looking down at her swollen eyes, he led her over to the couch so she could relax. She was shaking and by the looks of things, he knew that she was cold. Laying down with her, she rested her head on his chest and continued to cry, as hard as she could. All he could do right now, was rock her back and forth, rubs his hands against her hair, and assure her that everything will be okay. But, he knew that it wouldn't be. At least not right now.

After about an hour of laying there, Rachel's sobs finally came to a stop and she was left completely worn out, holding Finn as close to her as she possibly could. Repositioning herself to face him, she was finally ready to give him the full explanation.

"The doctors diagnosed her with Pancreatic cancer. It's terminal, Finn. there's nothing that they can do about it. They suggested chemo therapy, but she refused.. She has five weeks left at the most... Finn, my mom is going to die..." Rachel explained, her sobs coming back to her voice.

Hearing the news that she had just given him, Finn couldn't believe any of it. This couldn't be happening. Why? Why did this have to happen? was all he wondered. Holding her closer to him, Finn tried to calm her down, but she was hysterically crying right now.

"Shhh, baby, I'm so sorry.." He whispered trying to calm her down. He felt her pain. Shelby was just as close to Finn as she was to Rachel. When Rachel and Finn first told Shelby and Hiram that they wanted to get married, Shelby was the first to give them her blessings. Over the years, Shelby and Finn had sort of formed a mother, son bond. He saw her as his second mom. He always felt that he could go to her for advice, or to get funny stories about Rachel when she was younger. Shelby even told him once that he was her favorite son-in-law, which was definitely candy to his ears. So now, to Finn, it felt like he was loosing his mom too. Holding Rachel's now sleeping figure close to his side, Finn silently let the tears fall.

After that moment, he fell asleep with Rachel by his side. When he woke up, it was 6:30 pm and it was dark outside. Gently sliding out of the position, he gently placed another over Rachel's motionless frame and place a kiss on her forehead. He then turned away and walked into the kitchen, surprisingly being greeted by Haley, Rachel's oldest sister, and Finn's sister-in-law.

"Haley? What are you doing here? How did you get in the house?" He asked looking at her as she was sitting on a stool by the counter, drinking a cup of tea.

"The door was unlocked and I didn't know where else to go. Nathan and Jamie went to a baseball game today and they won't be back until 8:00. I couldn't stay at the hospital any longer and I didn't want to be by myself. Amy's told me she wanted to be alone, so I thought I could come here. How's Rachel doing?" She asked, looking in the direction of the living room.

"She's not doing too well, Haley." Finn said walking over to the other side of Haley. "I've never seen her cry so hard in my entire life." He added.

"Yeah, I figured this would be the hardest on her, since she's the closest to mom." Haley replied, taking a deep breath of air.

"I'm just curious, how come you're not crying like Rach and Amy?" Finn asked looking at Haley.

"Trust me, I've cried already. I've already been through this. I'm used to the grief, you know? Rach and Ames were both so young when dad died, they didn't really understand what was going on like I did. I was fifteen when he died. With grief there's this darkness that just hangs around, waiting for you to fall into it. I've learned from the past that you have to look for the light, even in the worst of times. In order to provide that light, I have to be strong for everyone. I can't let Ames and Rach see me cry. I'm used to the grief. I'm not saying that I'm going to be okay, or that I won't cry, because I will, but I have to make sure that everyone else will be okay. It's what my mom and dad would want the most." She replied staring down at her cup.

"You know, it's okay to let it out. I can't imagine what it must feel like. Hales, I'm so sorry for all of you." He replied with tears falling down his face as well.

"I'll cry when I'm alone, but for now I need to focus on these last couple of weeks that I actually have with her. I need to make sure that I tell her everything that I need to, before it's too late." She answered back.

"Haley? What are you doing here?" asked Rachel, with a confused look on her face, seeing Finn and Haley sitting at the counter, sharing a conversation.

"Hey, Rach.." Haley said calling her attention to Rachel. Getting down from the stool, Haley made her way over to Rachel and wrapped her into a sympathetic hug.

"Is she okay? I feel really bad, I just left like that. I couldn't handle it." Rachel looked at Haley's calm and straight face.

"She's okay. Don't worry, she understood. She checked out of the hospital and returned home. The doctor's told her that she needed a lot of rest, so I'm guessing she's just going to go straight to bed." She replied.

"She's all alone. Shouldn't we do something? Finn? Can she stay with us?" Rachel asked Finn sounding concerned.

"Definitely." Finn replied. "If there's anything that we can do, we should do it."

"Do you think she'll be okay with that?" Rachel asked Haley with a sad expression.

"I'm sure she'll appreciate it." Haley replied returning the expression. "Is it okay if we visit often if she does?" She added.

"Sure. Anytime. What about Amy?" Rachel asked Haley.

"I don't know. She's keeping to herself. She hasn't said anything to me. I think she's more angry than she is sad." Haley replied.

"Oh." She quietly said.

"Look, we can figure all of this out tomorrow, right now let's just not worry about what's going to come. Let's just focus on the good things about mom. Like all of the memories that we share with her. Remember that time we went to the zoo and Amy got bit by the giraffe, and mom told us not to laugh, but we ended up all laughing at her anyways?" Haley asked trying to lighten the mood in the household.

"Yes. Or that time for Thanksgiving, when the dog at the turkey and we had to replace it with mom's homemade chicken dumpling soup?" Rachel added as a small smile came across her face at the memory.

"Best Thanksgiving ever." Haley replied which gained a small laugh from the table.

"Do you guys remember that time when Rach introduced me to your parents and Shelby scared me into thinking that she hated my guts." Finn added in.

"Yes, we were practically on the ground laughing at your serious expression." Haley replied which gained another laugh from the table.

For the rest of that night, Rachel, Haley, and Finn sat at the counter sharing the best memories that they had of their mother, laughing. crying, singing, and sharing each other's emotions. Rachel thanked her lucky stars that her family was amazing as this one. She needed them, especially if she was going to face what was yet to come.

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**So here's another chapter. I hope you all enjoy. Review! :)**


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

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Getting out of her car the next day, Rachel took in all of the familiar surroundings. She definitely missed this place, since the last time she was here was when she was 18 years old, and she was beginning to get ready to leave for college. For Rachel, this place held so many childhood memories that no matter how hard she tried, she could never forget.

Crossing her arms over her chest, she walked away from her car, and continued to look around the familiar landmark. Looking down at the grass, Rachel could remember all of the many times that she ran around in it. Continuing her walk, Rachel came across the beautiful brick-tiled walkway that her mother designed when she was about 10. Walking over it, Rachel looked at all of the beautiful flowers that were place around it.

Gardening was a big part of Rachel's childhood with her mom. Rachel could remember how her mother would wake her up at around 9:00 every Saturday morning when she was around the ages of 9 and 10 and they would spend the rest of their day planting flowers, pulling weeds, and singing their favorite Broadway songs in low beautiful voices. One of the many things that Rachel had in common with Shelby was her amazing voices. Rachel remembered how her and her mother would put on small concerts for her father and sisters. Those were some of the most amazing memories that she had from her childhood.

One of the things that Rachel wished the most was that she could've understood better when she was younger. Rachel wished that she could've been able to comprehend what was happening to her father, when he was ill. One of her many regrets in life was not saying a proper goodbye to him like she wanted to give her mother. She knew it wasn't her fault since she was only 8 years old when he passed away and she didn't know what was going on. All her mom ever told her about her father was that he was going to a better place and that she would see him again. At the time, Rachel thought her mother was saying that he was going on trip and that he would come back sooner or later. As Rachel got older, she began to realize that he was gone, and she understood why her mother told her that. She wanted her to not be sad.

Looking back on that dreadful day, Rachel could say that she did get closure with her father. When they were about to leave the hospital room, Rachel jumped on her dad's lap and kissed him on the cheek, gave him a big hug, and told him that she loved him and that she would see him later. Those were the last things she ever said to her father.

Even though Rachel's father died a long time ago, Rachel remembered everything about him so clear, that it felt like he left just yesterday. She could remember the way he dressed, the smell of his favorite cologne, his distinctive laugh, the way he loved her mother, it was hard to forget any of it. Rachel wished that he was still there right now for her and her mother. Rachel knew that it killed Shelby when he died because they were absolute soul mates. Sometimes when Rachel and her sister, Amy, got up extra early, they would quietly creep down the stairs and sit on the last step as they watched their parents read the newspaper together. They were so happy.

When Hiram died, Shelby was left a different person. Her personality changed. She still laughed and smiled with her three daughters, but Rachel could tell that she wasn't the same. Rachel knew that when she and her sisters went to bed, her mother cried alone in her room. She could sometimes hear her having conversations with him. It broke Rachel's heart to see her mom like that.

Now knowing that she was going to lose her mom, Rachel had to spend as much time as she can with her, and make sure that she knows just how much she means to her. She just wished that her mother could be cured and that she could be okay. This wasn't fair to Rachel. Her father was already taken away from her, it wasn't fair that God was now going to take her mom too. She just wanted to scream to the top of her lungs, and punch everything around her. She hated this.

Getting to the back door of the house, Rachel knocked three times on the door, when she got no answer, she opened the unlocked door, and made her way upstairs to her mother's room. Opening the door, she found Shelby sitting on her bed watching the TV in her room.

"Hey, sweetie." She said turning off the TV and putting her full attention on Rachel.

"Hey, momma." She smiled, closing the door behind her.

"What brings you here?" She asked with a bright smile, seeing her youngest daughter walking up to her bed.

"I just wanted to see how you were doing. I also wanted to apologize for yesterday." She said nervously playing with her fingernails.

"Come see." She said patting a spot on the side of her, on her bed.

Getting on the side of her, Shelby wrapped her arms around Rachel and hugged her tight.

"I don't want to you to ever feel like I am mad at you. Understand? I understand how hard this is for all of us. You have nothing to apologize for baby." She said hugging her daughter close to her side.

"I understand. How are you feeling?" Rachel asked trying to change the subject.

"I'm okay. Just a little pain every now and then." Shelby replied.

"Have you been taking your meds?" Rachel asked like a concerned parent.

"Yes." Shelby replied.

"What about the bed rest? You haven't been walking around, have you?" Rachel asked again sounding more worried.

"Yes, I've been in bed. Aren't I supposed to be the parent?" Shelby asked with a small laugh.

"I guess. I'm just really worried about you mom." Rachel replied wiping a few stray tears falling from her eyes.

"Hey, don't worry about me, okay? I'm okay." Shelby said wiping Rachel's tears away from her face, just like she did when she was seventeen years old, when Santana Lopez made fun of her in front of the whole entire glee club.

"Everything's not okay, mom." Rachel sobbed. "You're my best friend! You can't leave me! This isn't fair!" She finally let go, letting all of her tears run free down her face.

"Rach, look at me. You are not losing me, okay? I will always be with you, even if you can't see me. I will always be right here." Shelby said pointing at Rachel's heart. "I know it's not fair, and it's very scary, but I've accepted it. I'm grateful to have been given a beautiful life, with three beautiful little girls. I just want to spend my last moments with all of you. I don't wanna fight against it, because I've already lived. I'm ready to go with your father." Shelby said as tears gathered in her eyes too.

"I can't do this, mom! I can't say goodbye to you. If you're gone, then so am I. You can't go. You just... you just can't. I won't let you." Rachel yelled sobbing into Shelby's side.

"Baby, please don't cry. I love you so much, baby girl. If there's one thing that I know about you Rachel Barbra Berry, it's that you're going to be okay. I know this is terrifying for you. It's terrifying for all of us. But, you're going to be okay. I believe in you." Shelby said holding Rachel closer to her.

"I love you, momma." Rachel replied, looking up at her mother's eyes, which now had tears falling from them.

"I love you too, princess." Shelby responded. "Okay, this is too depressing." Shelby said looking down at her daughter laying next to her.

"I know." Rachel agreed.

"We should think about good things." Shelby said smiling down at her.

"Yeah. I know." Rachel said looking back up at her. "It's funny that you say that, Hales, Finn, and I were sharing funny memories last night."

"Oh yeah? Like what?" Shelby asked sounding interested.

"Like, remember that time when we all went to the zoo, and Amy got bit by that giraffe?" Rachel said trying to gain a laugh.

"Yes! I felt terrible. We shouldn't have all been laughing at her, but it was just so funny!" Shelby said laughing with her.

"That moment was the funniest!" Rachel said laughing with her.

"How about that time when you were about 13 years old and came crying home to me saying that Santana Lopez told you that you were worthless? Remember what I told you?" Shelby added.

"You said that if someone tells you that you are worthless, to ignore them, because I am worth more than life itself." Rachel smiled taking her mother's hand in hers.

"You're worth the world to me baby girl." Shelby told her daughter.

"So are you." Rachel said looking up at the ceiling, just like her mom.

"What about that time when you came home with a very tall and awkward young man who told me that my daughter was the best thing that has ever happened to him?" Shelby asked Rachel as she smiled seeing Rachel's face light up brighter than the sun.

"I swear, he almost peed himself. He was so nervous." Rachel laughed.

"I remember that day like it was yesterday. I had a blast messing with him. He looked like he wanted to cry!" Shelby laughed with Rachel.

"I think he did cry!" Rachel added.

"Wanna know something? Finn has always been my favorite from the moment I met him. He came marching into my house like he was so sure that he loved you. He was very similar to Nathan, when Haley asked dad and I if they could get married. But, of coarse you guys were much older than the two of them. From the moment I saw how he looked at you, I knew that he was serious about how he felt. I mean, I had my doubts in the beginning, but now, I know I made the right choice to hand my baby girl over to him. Finn Hudson will always be my favorite son in law, right next to Nathan, of coarse." Shelby said watching Rachel's face light up even more.

"Can I tell you something, momma?" Rachel asked.

"Anything." She replied.

"From the time I was 6 years old, I would always sneak down the stairs in the morning and watch you and daddy read the newspaper and complete each other's word puzzles, or at midnight, I would watch you two dance to slow music. Seeing your smiles, I knew that was what real love must've looked like. The way you guys looked at each other, it made me believe that maybe someday I could have that. When I met Finn, he made me feel the exact same way that you guys felt about each other. All of my life, I wanted to find a love just like my parents had. Now, I have that. Finn makes me feel that way everyday of my entire life." Rachel said wiping the tears that tended to stray again.

"All of my life, that is exactly what I wanted for my beautiful girls. I'm glad that you told me that. I already knew though. Seeing the way that you guys looked at each other at your wedding, I knew that you guys were as in love as dad and I were." Shelby said holding her closer to her. "I want to give you something, Rach." She said getting up from the bed and walking to her closet, grabbing a big box. "Here" She said placing it on the bed.

"What is it?" Rachel asked looking at the box with curiosity.

"Come see for yourself." She said opening it.

Getting closer to it, Rachel was surprised at what she saw.

The box contained a lot of old things. Their was a small baby outfit, Rachel's old raddle, Rachel's old teddy bear, Mr. Cuddles, who was sewed up a lot, a picture of Billy, their dog they had a long time ago, Rachel's old pacifier, a tiny pair of baby booties, a very familiar gold brush, which had "baby girl" written on the back of it, and Rachel's "special", which was her favorite blanket that she carried around everywhere. The last two items were her favorite and contained the most memories, along with Mr. Cuddles. Rachel loved the old brush, because her mother used to brush her hair with it every morning. Mr. Cuddles and her "special" were important to her too because they were both given to her by her father. Her "special" was now worn down to the core. It had rips in it and was dirty, but it was still in the shape of the pink, cuddly blanket that she remembered and loved the most. Mr. Cuddles was a different story. He wasn't as dirty as her "special" because she hadn't taken it everywhere. Mr. Cuddles was specifically reserved for bed time. Even though the teddy bear wasn't as dirty as her "special", it definitely went through some rough times. When Rachel was 5 years old, Mr. Cuddle's head was ripped off when Amy and her were fighting over it. Mr. Cuddles also had mascara marks on him from Rachel's bad breakup with Jessie St. James during her freshman year. All of these things were very important to her.

"I thought that you would like to give these things to your children, which, hopefully will be very soon." Shelby said winking at Rachel.

"Mom!" Rachel said throwing the blanket at her.

"What? You guys aren't getting any younger..." She replied with a giggle.

"Thanks for all of this stuff. I really appreciate it." Rachel said going to the other side of the room to hug her mom.

"Anything for my baby girl." She replied.

"Okay. I have a proposition for you." Rachel said, getting her mom's attention.

"What is it?" she asked.

"Finn and I want you to move in with us, so you won't be lonely." Rachel said.

"Rachel, that's really sweet of you, but, I can't accept." She replied.

"What? Why not?" She asked back.

"Because, I'm fine where I am right now. I like the peace and quiet. It's soothes me." She said looking at Rachel's disappointed face.

"Can you at least come for a week or two. It would be like a vacation. Please momma, I don't you to go through this alone." She begged her mother.

"No, I don't wanna be a bother to the two of you. I fine, trust me." she replied.

"Are you kidding? You're never a bother. Please mom, I'm begging you. You shouldn't be alone right now. We'll let you stay in your favorite guest bedroom, with the really comfy bed. We'll even fix you breakfast in bed every morning. Please.." Rachel was now on her knees and had a puppy dog look on her face.

"Alright, fine." Shelby gave in.

"Thank you!" Rachel replied hugging her mom.

"Just keep in mind that you're the child, not me." Shelby said to Rachel.

"I know." She replied.

"I guess a few weeks will be fine. But what happens when...?" She started but Rachel stopped her.

"Don't say that." Rachel said.

"Okay. I'll get my things together." She said.

"No, I'll do it. You need to lay down." Rachel said stopping her.

"Rach, I'm not going to let you baby me. I'm doing this." She said walking towards her closet.

By 4:30 pm, All of Shelby's bags were packed, and she was ready to go home with Rachel.

"Okay, mom. Are you ready? I told Finn we would be home by 5, so we better get moving. I'll put your things in the car." Rachel said to her mom.

"Okay." She replied. "I'll be in the car."

"Okay." She smiled.

By the time they left, all of Shelby's things were in the back of Rachel's car, along with the box of things from Rachel's childhood. When they arrived at the house, it was 5:03 pm. Getting all of the things out of the car, Rachel followed behind Shelby to the front door of her house. Getting into the house, they were greeted by Haley, Finn, Nathan, and Jamie.

"Oh my gosh, hey guys!" Shelby said walking into the house.

"Grandma!" Jamie exclaimed running towards her to hug her legs.

"Hey little man!" She replied as she picked him up. "You've gotten so big."

Leaving Shelby with Nathan, Haley, and Jamie, Rachel went to bring her things up to the guest room, with Finn following behind, carrying the box of the things Shelby gave her. Placing the things on the bed, Finn placed the box on the bed as well.

"You can put that box in our room." She said to him.

"Oh, I thought this was hers." He replied heading towards their room, with Rachel following behind him.

"Uh, no. She actually wanted me to have it." She said smiling at him.

"What is it?" He asked looking at the box with a confused face.

Walking over to it, She opened the box, allowing Finn to see what was in it.

"It's a bunch of my old things, that she wanted me to have. She said that we should give them to our children." Rachel said looking up at Finn, who was going through the things with a smile on his face.

Sitting next to him, Rachel rested her head on his shoulder, as he pulled out the small baby outfit and the tiny booties.

"This was yours?" He asked looking at her.

"Yeah. I was small, huh?" She replied.

"You sure were." He replied.

"Who's this?" he asked picking up the picture of the dog.

"That's Eddy." She replied. "I haven't told you about Eddy?" She asked looking at his face.

"No." He replied.

"He was our old family dog. He was the one who ate the turkey." She replied.

"Oh yeah." He replied laughing.

"I still can't get over how cute this is." He added picking up the small outfit and booties again. "Look at the little balloons and teddy bears on it! and look how small these shoes are!" He said, while they both held the outfit in their hands.

"I know. It's adorable." She said smiling at him.

"Is this the famous Mr. Cuddles?" He asked.

"I'm surprised you remembered." She replied.

"How could I not? You wouldn't shut up about him on our third date." He said laughing.

"Oh yeah, I remember that!" She replied laughing with him.

"What's this?" he asked taking out the pink blanket.

"That's my 'special'." She answered him.

"You're what?" He asked looking confused.

"You know, my special, my favorite blanket from when I was a child." She replied.

"You called it your 'special'?" He asked laughing at her.

"At least it's a better name than your Gikki." She replied laughing at his serious face.

"Hey! I loved my Gikki." He replied laughing with her.

"And I loved my 'special'" She replied. "My dad gave it to me.." She added.

"My dad gave me my Gikki." Finn replied trying to make her feel better.

"Oh yeah, I remember that you told me that." Rachel said looking at his saddened expression.

"Yeah. It's the only thing I had from him. I took it everywhere with me." He said.

"I took my special everywhere too, hence the rips and dirt." She added.

"What's the story with Mr. Cuddles? Why does he have so many sew patches?" Finn asked holding the teddy bear in his hands.

"Let's just say that Mr. Cuddles has been through a lot. Amy ripped his head off, his arm got torn off by the dog, and a bunch of other things. You see this black mark right here?" She asked pointing it.

"Yeah." He said looking at it.

"Tears from my breakup with Jessie St. James, freshman year." She said looking at the teddy bear.

"He was a jerk. You deserved way better." Finn said wrapping his arm around her shoulder.

"I did get way better. I have you." She smiled.

"Aww. I love you baby." He smiled, holding her close to his side.

"I don't know how I'll be able to look at these things when she's gone." Rachel said holding up the gold brush.

"It'll be tough, but it'll get better." He said.

"What if it doesn't, Finn?" She asked looking at her pacifier.

"It will. I promise." He said.

Picking up the small booties again, Rachel just sat there and stared at them. They were so small.

"You know, my mom told me something really crazy today." She said.

"What did she tell you?" He asked.

"She told me that we weren't getting any younger and that we needed to fill this outfit and shoes soon." She said turning to Finn, who looked at her with a shocked look on his face.

"What did you say?" He asked.

"I threw my blanket at her." She replied laughing.

"Do you think we should?" He asked holding the pacifier in his hands.

"Do you?" She asked. She didn't know what to say. She was only 24 years old and she was going to lose her mom in the span of a month or two.

"I can't say that I haven't thought of it before. But now that you brought it up, I think it's a good idea. Maybe in a few years when we've healed from what's going on right now." He said smiling at her.

"You're right." She agreed.

"Oh, wow. We left everyone alone downstairs." Finn said just realizing that they've been talking for a while.

"Just leave the stuff, I clean it up later." Rachel said walking out the door with Finn behind her.

Getting down the stairs, Rachel and Finn walked into the kitchen, seeing Haley and Nathan hugging a crying Shelby.

"Hey Hales, what's going on?" Rachel asked with a worried expression.

"Just a lot of emotional things going on." Haley replied.

Seeing Jamie looking worried at his Grandma's sad face, Rachel decided something.

"Hey, how about Finn and I take Jamie out for something to eat while you guys talk. We won't be long, I promise." Rachel asked looking at Nathan and Haley.

"Are you sure?" Haley asked.

"Yeah, it's no problem. We'll give you guys your space." Finn said behind

"I don't know. Are you guys sure you don't mind?" Nathan asked them.

"It's no problem, man. We'll be back around 8:00." Finn replied.

"Okay." Haley and Nathan both replied.

"Okay, let's go get you ready little man!" Rachel exclaimed, leading Jamie up the stairs, with Finn following behind them.

Getting into the spare bedroom that was reserved for Jamie, Rachel went through his clothes, looking for the best looking clothes.

"Let's make you look like a celebrity!" She said grabbing a pair of jeans, a blue shirt, and a pair of tennis shoes.

"Rach, he has a Star Wars shirt! Let's dress him in this shirt." Finn said holding the shirt up.

"No. This shirt suits him better." She said holding up the blue shirt.

"That shirt is so plain! Please, Star Wars rocks!" He replied.

"We'll let him pick." She said.

"Fine" He answered back.

"What do you wanna wear, Jimmie Jam?" Rachel asked looking at the small child.

"Star Wars." He said looking at the shirt that Finn was hold up.

"All right! Give me high five buddy!" Finn exclaimed, giving Jamie a high five and putting the shirt on him.

"Come see, Jamie. Let Rachie put your jeans on you." Rachel said after Finn put on his Star Wars shirt. "Finn, can you get his shoes and socks?" Rachel asked Rachel.

"Sure." He said.

After they were both done dressing him, he looked cute as a button with his shirt and jeans, and light up tennis shoes.

"Wait, it's freezing outside. He needs his coat." Rachel said.

"He's got sleeves on the shirt. He'll be fine." Finn replied.

"Are you kidding? Those sleeves are so thin. He'll get sick. Wait right here, I'll be right back." She said running back upstairs to get his coat.

"Okay. Here you go, Jamie." She smiled placing the big coat on his small body. "Alright, boys. Let's go!" She exclaimed, heading for the front door.

After getting Jamie's car seat out of Haley's car, They placed it in Finn's truck and strapped Jamie in. Pulling out of the driveway, Rachel looked at Jamie in the back of the truck. He was so fascinated with his surroundings. He was so cute. She loved her nephew.

Turning on the radio, Finn and Rachel both smiled as they heard their song come on the radio.

"Jamie, you wanna sing with us?" Finn asked looking at the smiling little boy in the back seat of the car.

"Okay." He replied.

Reaching for Finn's hand, Rachel grabbed it as he started singing the first verse.

_Highway Run, into the midnight sun, wheels go round and round, you're on my mind._

* * *

**I hope all of you enjoyed this chapter. I decided to list it as a One Tree Hill and Glee crossover. For all of you who aren't familiar with One Tree Hill, it's okay because I'm not throwing any of the past story lines from the show in this story, I'm just including the characters. For all of you who are familiar with One Tree Hill, I'm going to make Jamie 4 years old in this story, So Nathan and Haley got married in high school, but they didn't have Jamie until later. Okay, that's it for now! I appreciate all of you are reading my story! Review! :)**


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

* * *

Laying on her back in bed, Rachel sighed at the fact that she couldn't fall asleep, no matter how hard she tried. The only thing going on right now in Rachel's head was the endless amount of problems and worries throwing themselves at her. Which wasn't unusual, since every time Rachel actually wanted to fall asleep, they would always creep up on her like a monster in a horror movie. No matter how many tosses and turns she did, they wouldn't go away.

Turning to her side, Rachel looked at her alarm clock, wanting to smack herself in the face, seeing it was 3:30 am. She really had to go to sleep now if she was going to wake up for work early in the morning. She had exactly 2 hours left to sleep, and she wasn't tired at all. All Rachel could do was lay down, stair at the ceiling fan making it's many rotations, and think of her present worries and problems, most of them including her mother.

Time was ticking for her mother. They found out that she had about 5 weeks left, 2 weeks ago. So, if calculations go right, Rachel only had three weeks left to tell her mother everything that she could, and to do everything that she's wanted to. Rachel knew it wouldn't be possible to do everything on a deadline, but she had to try.

Thinking of saying goodbye to Shelby was like a huge knife through the heart to Rachel. She didn't want it to happen. She had already told her mother how she felt about all of this, but Rachel felt like no one really understood what she was going through. Even though Haley and Amy were losing her too, Rachel felt that they didn't really feel the exact same weight on their hearts that she was feeling now. Rachel didn't want to say that they didn't care that much, because Rachel knew with all her heart that they were devastated just as she was, but Rachel always held a closer bond with Shelby than the two of them. Amy and Haley always held a closer connection to their dad than Rachel did. She was always her mother's girl, which made this extremely difficult for her.

Another thing that made it difficult for Rachel to see was the pain that Shelby was in. Every day Rachel could see it all over her face, even though she denied it every time. Rachel wished there was a magic spell that she could cast to make her mother all better. If only life was that easy.

Tossing back on her other side, Rachel felt hopeless. She wasn't getting any sleep tonight, why try? Getting up, she walked to her bathroom, grabbing her robe, and making her way downstairs. Quietly, she made her way to the front door of the house, Turning the knob and opening it, shivering at the cold breeze hitting her as she walked out and shut the door behind her.

Walking to their pond in the back of Finn and Rachel's house, Rachel wrapped her arms around herself and walked along the pathway. Getting to the giant pond, Rachel leaned against the balcony that overlooked it. Looking up at the stars and the moon in the sky, Rachel decided to do something that she hadn't done in years. She decided to speak with her father.

"Hey daddy. I know it's 4:00 in the morning and I should be sleeping right now. But I can't. I just really wanted to come out here and talk to you like I used to. Things are bad, daddy and I don't know who else to talk to. Everyone always looks at me with pity when I want someone to talk to, and when I talk to mom, she tries to change the subject. I need someone that I can let all my worries and problems out to. I need someone to understand my pain that I feel right now. You're the only person that possibly can. I don't want her to leave me, daddy. I don't want her to leave like you did. I want both of you to come back to me. What am I going to do? Should I cry? Should I pray? Because honestly, I think both of those things are useless. How can someone just take her from me? Us? I can't do this. When she's gone, who is going to give me advice, who is going to be on the other side of the daily phone calls? She told me I would move on, but I don't think it's that simple. I can already feel my heart slowly starting to sink. I don't know what I'm going to do daddy. I'm scared..." Rachel let out sobbing into the quiet night.

Looking up at the sky, Rachel's eyes quickly started to brighten and her tears ran down her face, as she watched a star shoot across the sky. To Rachel, that star was a sign from her father. She knew deep down in her heart that he heard everything that she had just said to him, and that that star was a sign from him that everything would be okay. It made Rachel feel a lot more better knowing that her father really was looking down on her and listening to her.

After about 3 more hours of sitting outside and watching the sun rise in the sky, Rachel finally decided that she would make her way back to her house, as It was almost time for her to start getting ready for work. Walking into the house, Rachel sighed with relief that the heater in their house was on and the coldness was gone.

Walking into the kitchen, Rachel was greeted by her husband, who was already dressed and ready for work.

"Morning, babe." she smiled slowly walking over to where he was sitting.

"Rach, where have you been. I was worried sick when I woke up and you weren't there." He replied standing up and getting closer to her.

"I know, I'm sorry baby. I couldn't sleep so I went sit by the pond. I didn't want to wake you, you looked so peaceful." She said placing her hand on the side of his cheek.

"You didn't go to sleep last night?" He asked looking down at her with concern in his eyes.

"I tried, but I couldn't." She answered back.

"That's okay. Here, sit down and I will fix you some coffee." He said directing her to the stool.

"Remember to put milk with..." She didn't finish.

"A lot of sugar, I know sweetie." He finished her sentence for her.

"Have I told you how much I loved you lately?" she said smiling into his beautiful amber eyes.

"You let me know everyday." He smiled back, handing her a mug of hot coffee.

After finishing her coffee, She went upstairs to get dressed and ready for work. She really didn't feel like going today, but It was best for both her and her students If she did. Finally ready to leave, Rachel and Finn made their way out of the front door, and into their separate cars. Rachel found it very weird that they took separate cars to work, since they worked at the same school, but she loved being able to tell him about her day.

Getting to the parking lot, Rachel and Finn said their final "I love you" and parted their different ways.

Walking into her classroom, Rachel found it freezing in the classroom. After turning on the heater, she made her way over to her desk and went over her lesson plan again for the day. Everything seemed good to her.

Looking back towards her high school life, Rachel would have never said that she wanted to become an English teacher at McKinley high. But ever since Finn proposed to her in her senior year, she thought of being no where but Lima, Ohio. Deep down in her heart she missed the thrill that singing gave her, but she wouldn't change a thing now. She loved being a teacher. She loved waking up every morning knowing that she was helping many kids better their career paths.

When she first started teaching at the school, many of the teachers would warn her about the students. They would always make remarks about how they were terrible teenagers and that they wouldn't listen to her even if their lives depended on it. In the beginning Rachel had to admit that the teachers may have had a point. Some of those kids could be really mean, especially Jordan Parker. On the first day, greeting her new students into her classroom, Rachel was thrown back to her freshman year when she met Jordan. Jordan Parker was a tall brunette cheerio, who reminded Rachel very much of her high school arch nemesis, Santana Lopez. Her appearance wasn't the only thing that reminded Rachel of Santana. She had a very bad attitude to some of the other students in her class, and she flirted with Jason Perry, the quarterback of the football team, like he was fish bait.

During their first few weeks of school, Jordan would always talk back to Rachel and push her past her limits when It came to making her angry. Since it was her first few weeks of teaching, Rachel would have to call the principal into the classroom because she couldn't handle it. After multiple weeks of calling the principal into her classroom, crying to Finn about her terrible days, and multiple glasses of wine, Rachel finally found a solution to her students. Rachel made the decision to treat her students like she treated her fellow classmates in high school, with her sassy and bossy attitude. After that moment, she hadn't gotten as much trouble with her students anymore. She still has to put up with fights from a few students, but it's not as bad as it was.

When the bell finally rang, Rachel looked up to see that someone was already walking to their seat in her classroom. She recognized the student as Michele Clement. Michele was one of Rachel's favorite students. She never gave her any trouble in class. She also got to class early everyday and was always ready to learn what Rachel had to teach. Rachel could guess that Michele's favorite subject was English since she always had a big smile on her face when she entered the classroom. The only negative thing about Michele was that she was very shy. Rachel never heard any words from her unless they were to ask a question or to correct any mistakes that she could. Other than that, she was a very nice girl.

"Good morning, Mrs. Hudson." She said greeting Rachel from her desk.

"Good morning, sweetie!" Rachel replied with a smile on her face. "How was your weekend?" She asked looking in her direction.

"Same as usual... Boring." She said with an annoyed expression on her face.

"Aww, that's a bummer. If it makes you feel any better, my weekend wasn't all that great either." She replied looking at Michele with sympathy in her eyes.

"It doesn't... So, what are we doing today, Mrs. Hudson?" She asked pulling out all of her supplies on her desk.

"Well, I was actually planning on giving you guys an essay in stead of a test for this week." She said, smiling when she saw the annoyance on Michele's face.

"I knew you'd give me that look. Relax, knowing you, it'll be an easy a. Plus, the topics are going to be interesting." She said getting up to write the assignment on the board.

"If you say so." She answered back.

Once more students started to come into the classroom, Rachel wasn't really surprised when Michele didn't say another word. In McKinley high, Michele was considered one of the social outcasts like Rachel was when she was in high school. Rachel would often witness the terrible things being said about her or terrible things being done to her. It broke Rachel's heart that such a sweet girl had to be treated in such a way. Michele was a very sweet and very beautiful girl. She didn't deserve any of this.

After most of the class got to school, Rachel was still missing two students, Jordan and Jason, go figure. After about another two minutes of waiting for them, they came in one after the other.

"You two are late. Let me guess, bathroom quickie?" Rachel asked smiling when the class reacted with laughter.

"You think you're so funny, don't you, Mrs. Hudson?" Jordan said in a sassy remark.

"I was just coming back from the football field. Coach Hudson pulled in a few extra minutes from practice. I have an excuse note, here." Jason explained pulling the note from his pocket and handing it to her.  
_Please excuse Jason Perry for being a little late to class. I ran practice a little later this morning than I should have. I apologize. Have a great day, babe. See you at lunch... xoxo Finn_

After reading the note, Rachel finally returned back to her students.

"Okay, go take a seat." She said motioning Jason to take his desk.

After seeing Jordan following, Rachel stopped her.

"What's your excuse, young lady?" She asked crossing her arms and looking at her.

"Well, I,I, I just had better places to be." She said with a smirk on her face making the rest of the class laugh.

"Funny. I guess that explains why you're failing this class." she threw back at her making the class go crazy with her good comeback. "Now, if you will, take your seat and we'll begin class." She added.

Walking over to the only open desk available, Jordan stopped and got Rachel's attention again.

"Umm, there has to be some sort of mistake. I'm not sitting here today." She said standing by the desk in front of Michele.

"And why is that?" Rachel asked crossing her arms over her chests.

"Because, I don't want to catch any diseases from Ms. loner over here." Jordan remarked gaining a laugh from the whole student body.

Looking at Michele, Rachel could tell that she was deeply offended by what she said.

"Well, I'm very sorry for you. You should get to class earlier next time. Now, apologize to Michele, she did not deserve that." Rachel said looking at Jordan with angry eyes.

"Fine." She said then turned to face Michele. "I'm very sorry. I'm sorry that your parents have to face the fact that they've raised their daughter into a loser every time they look at you." She said in a sarcastic tone, laughing at the end.

With the hurt expression on Michele's face, Rachel was ready to step in. But before she could step in, Michele started to talk.

"You know, I'm sorry for you too, Jordan."

"And why are you sorry for me?" Jordan asked putting on a serious expression and crossing her arms.

"I'm sorry that YOUR parents have to look at their once innocent daughter, and worry that she'll come home with a baby or and STD, because let's face it, You're the cheese tray. You get passed around at every party. I'm also sorry for you. I'm sorry that you have to make other people feel less of themselves so you can feel better about yourself. In reality, Jordan, you're no better than the homeless man that sits outside across the street from school everyday." With that, Michele got up from her desk, and ran out the classroom.

"Okay.. How about you guys start working on your assignment on the board? I'll be right back." Rachel called as she followed behind Michele.

Checking the bathrooms first, Rachel found Michele at the sink, wiping away her tears with a tissue.

"Mrs. Hudson? You didn't have to come see about me. I'll be okay." She said seeing Rachel enter the bathroom from the mirror.

"Are you okay? those were some harsh things that she said to you." Rachel said getting closer to her.

"I'm fine. It's nothing new. But, I do think that's the first time I ever stood up to her like that." She said wiping away her tears.

"You know none of those things that she said are true, right? I'm sure you're parents are very proud of you." She said to Michele, who turned to face Rachel.

"Yeah, I hope they are. They passed away when I was seven." She said looking down at her shoes.

"Oh my gosh, Michele I am so sorry. I didn't know." Rachel said looking at Michele with sympathy in her eyes.

"It's okay. I don't really like to tell people. It was a long time ago." Michele answered back.

"Can I tell you a secret?" Rachel said sitting down on the bathroom floor.

"Sure." She said joining her.

"I'm about to have lost both of my parents too." Rachel let out looking up at the ceiling while wiping away a stray tear.

"I hope you don't mind me asking, but how?" She asked looking at Rachel's face.

"My dad when I was 8 years old, and now my mom has a few weeks left. Cancer." She replied.

"I'm very sorry, Mrs. Hudson." Michele said hugging Rachel.

"Thanks.. Okay, how about we get back to class before we both get into trouble?" She said standing up and holding her hand out for Michele to take it, and join her in walking back to class.

When they got back, Rachel was surprised to see all of her students actually doing their work. Walking behind Michele, she decided to make some different arrangements in her class.

"Michael, can you go take Michele's desk?" She asked. he pleasantly nodded. Grabbing all of his stuff, he made the move.

"Okay, Michele you can go take Michael's old desk, right in front of Jason." Rachel pointed, with Michele quickly following her directions.

"Alright, let's continue the assignment. This will be turned in as a test grade on Friday. On Wednesday, we will go to the library and type our essays, so please use these two days of writing to your advantage, don't waste it. If it's not turned in by Friday, you'll get an F, unless you are absent or have a legitimate excuse why you don't have it. Good luck!" She finished, returning to her desk.

For the rest of the period, Rachel sat quietly grading last week's tests as her students silently worked on their essays. Occasionally, Rachel would her loud sighs from the students, making it completely obvious of their annoyance with her for making them write the essay. She smiled, remembering when she was like that.

When the lunch bell finally rang that day, Rachel quickly got out of her classroom, and made her way to the teacher's lounge across the school campus. Getting to the teacher's lounge, Rachel's day got a whole lot better when she saw her husband sitting down at a table, enjoying the sandwich that she made him this morning.

"Hey beautiful." Finn said looking up at her as she walked closer to the table.

"Hi, baby." She replied with a sigh, placing her planning period bag on the table, and walking over to give him a kiss.

"I'm guessing your day hasn't been good so far." He said looking at her expression.

"Not really." She said smiling lightly at him.

"What's going on? Tell me what happened, baby." He said reaching over to rub her shoulder.

"Just so much drama! You know that girl Jordan Parker, right?" she asked looking at Finn for an answer.

"I think everyone in this school knows her Rach." He replied placing his hand over hers after seeing her distressed expression.

"Well, anyways, she caused a huge commotion in class today. She's been mindlessly picking on this girl, Michele Clement. And Michele is a nice girl. She told her that her parents should be sorry for raising a loser of a daughter, and Michele ran out the classroom crying. So, of course I went to check on her, and she told me that her parents both died when she was younger. I feel really bad for her, Finn.. I want to make every thing better for, but I don't know how." She explained to him.

"Rach, you did everything you were supposed to. Some teachers wouldn't have even followed the student to see if she was okay, but you did. You have a caring and humble heart, Rach. I know because I fell in love with you for it." Finn said looking deep into her eyes.

"Ever since she told me that both of her parents died, I figured out why she kept to herself. Jordan Parker is wrong for calling her out on that. I mean, I kind of know how she feels, not completely, but soon I will, and I can't help feeling like I need to do everything I can to make sure that she's okay. I can't even imagine being that young and losing both of your parents." Rachel said looking down at her can of coke.

"Maybe you should tell her that you're there for her. That's a good way to help, letting her know that she has support." Finn replied looking at Rachel with concerned eyes.

"You're right. Okay, enough about my day. How was YOUR day, honey?" She asked cheering up a bit to lighten the mood.

"It's actually going well so far. It helps that I get to see my sexy wife at work." He smirked kissing both of her hands.

"People are staring!" She giggled as he continued.

"Let them stare. I love my wife, everyone should know that." He replied.

"I love my husband too. Finn, I really want you to know that I really appreciate everything you've been doing to help me with my mom and stuff. You're the most amazing guy in the whole entire world. I don't know if I've told you that lately. I just wanted you to know." She said holding his hand in hers.

"Rach, even if your mother wasn't sick, I would always be there for you. You're my life. Your family is my family, your problems are my problems, your worries are my worries, and my home is your home. I will do anything I have to do to make sure that you stay as happy as you possibly can." He said pulling her to sit next to him.

"What are we gonna do, Finn? Time's getting shorter." She said resting her head on his shoulder as he wrapped his arm around her.

"We're going to do the only thing we can do right now. We're going to spend everyday with her like it's our last, and we're going to make sure that she knows everything that we want to tell her." He replied.

"If it's okay with you, I was planning on going see her after I get off from work this afternoon. I still don't feel comfortable that she returned back home." Rachel whispered quietly.

"Rach, you don't have to ask my permission. Of course you can go. Besides, I have to have a meeting with the glee students at around 3 till 4, then I have football practice until 7:30, so take all of the time you need. I won't be home to around 8:00." He explained to her.

"Okay." she replied.

"Hudson! Your quarterback started a fight in the courtyard. Get your ass out there!" Yelled Stephen McCannon, the coach of the baseball team.

"Crap! Rach, I got to go. I'll see you later. I love you, baby." He said quickly standing up and giving her a peck on the lips.

"I love you too. See you later." She called behind him before he was gone.

When the final bell rang to release Rachel's last period students, Rachel quickly gathered her things from her desk, and headed out of her classroom, following her normal path to her car.

Getting in her car, she quickly left the school to get to her mother's house. When she got there, she let herself in, finding her mom sitting at the kitchen table, drinking a cup of tea. Entering the kitchen, Rachel placed her keys on the counter and walked over to her mom, who looked awful pale today.

"Mom, you're supposed to be in bed right now." She said placing her hands on her hips.

"I tried Rach. It was too much pain. I feel better sitting like this." She explained.

"Okay. Just, be careful." She said sitting next to her at the table.

"So, what brings my beautiful baby girl here today?" Shelby asked.

"I thought it would be a nice afternoon for me if I spent it with my mom. Finn's not going to be back home till 8, so I don't have to be home that early. Plus, I like spending time with you. I love you, momma." She said placing her hand over her mothers.

"Stop that." Shelby replied to Rachel's surprise.

"Stop what?" She asked looking confused.

"You know, the "I better tell her I love her as much as I can before she goes so she knows"." Shelby said with a laugh.

"I'm being serious, momma. I really mean it." She said smiling with her mom.

"I know you do, baby. And guess what? I love you more." She replied.

"That's not possible." She said looking up at her mom with a big smile on her face.

"Oh yes it is. I've been doing it for 24 years." She said smiling down at her youngest daughter.

"Has Amy visited yet?" Rachel randomly asked.

"Not yet. I think she's waiting for the right time." Her mother said. God bless her mother's heart. Rachel knew that that was not even close to the real reason why Amy hasn't visited yet. If only her mother could see that Amy was guilty of so many things. Her mother always did see the best in Amy, also including her and Haley. She loved her mother for that.

"No, Amy's just being a selfish bitch." She said in an angry tone.

"Hey, don't say that. She's your sister." Shelby replied at her remark.

"She should be here, mom! She's being selfish! She's only worrying about her own problems. She should be here helping all of us!" Rachel exclaimed.

"She'll be here. She just needs her time." Shelby assured Rachel.

"There isn't that much time left!" Rachel yelled out without thinking.

"Mom, i'm sorry. I didn't mean for it to come out like that..." Rachel began trying to explain to her speechless mom.

"I know sweetie. It's okay. Excuse me for a second." Her mother said before walking away and locking herself in the bathroom.

Rachel felt like an idiot. Why the hell did she just do that? She hoped her mother would come out of the bathroom soon so she could apologize for what she just said to her. She didn't mean to say that, she was just so mad that Amy was being stubborn in this situation. They should all be together during a time like this. They should be crying together, being there for each other. Like a real family.

Sitting at the table, Rachel began to become worried. Her mother had been in the bathroom for 5 minutes now. Getting up from the table, Rachel went to the bathroom, knocking on the door, to see if she would answer her.

After about 5 knocks, Rachel still got no answer.

"Mom? Are you okay in there?" Rachel asked waiting for an answer. After none, Rachel began to panic. Trying to turn the door knob, Rachel found it locked, which made her worry even more.

Pushing against the door as hard as she could with her elbows, Rachel tried as hard as she could to get through the door. She decided to take a running start to break down the door. After about two failed attempts, Rachel finally got through. When she broke it open, she was filled with horror at her sight. Her mother was laying on the floor with her eyes closed.

"Momma!" Rachel yelled in complete horror.

Everything went numb. She couldn't move a muscle. All she could do was stand there and yell at her mom to wake up. Finally, she made her way over to the house phone, and called the ambulance. All she could do now was impatiently wait.

* * *

**I hope you all enjoy this chapter. I will try to add more characters in the next few chapters. Sorry for the long delay, I've just been so busy with all of my school work and stuff. Anyways, thank you all for reading! Review! :)**


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

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It felt like days to her. Maybe even weeks. The waiting. Not knowing. Rachel now knew why they called it the waiting room.

No one had told her anything yet. All she had left to do was wait for any type of news that would be given to her. Which, by the look of things, wasn't going to be any time soon. They had pulled up to the hospital about an hour ago. Getting out of the ambulance, that's when Rachel was separated from her mother.

Rachel could still feel the direct agony in her heart. The way that the surgeon had to hold her back, while a few others rolled her mom away. All she could think of now was how she was screaming for her unconscious mom. Everyone looked at her as though she had some sort of problem. She didn't care. All she wanted was to be at her mom's side, and to tell her that she really didn't mean what she had said earlier.

Thinking of their last moment together brought chills to Rachel's spine, and not the good ones. She had to see her mother again. At least one more time. Those harsh words that Rachel threw out couldn't be the last ones. She had to let her know that she was sorry. She had to know that she loved her more than anything. She hadn't even had the chance to get her secret chocolate chip cookie recipe that she had always wanted since she was a child.

With tears running down her swollen eyes, she remembered the first time that her mother cooked the cookies with her and her sisters. It was a late afternoon in the middle of June. Rachel and her sisters had just come in from a long day of playing on their brand new swing set that their dad had built for them. Rachel was 5, Amy was 7, and Haley was 12. Rachel could remember the light breeze blowing the trees around on the hot sunny day. Haley had suggested that they all get a cup of lemonade to bring out to the play area. Running, Rachel held on tight to her older sister's hand as they made their way to the back door of the house.

Rachel still remembers the smell of the house when they got into it. The didn't know what was going on, but they wanted to find out.

"Mom, what's smells so good?" Asked Haley as they all found a place at the counter to sit.

"Well, i'm baking my very own secret chocolate chip cookie recipe that Grandma Maggie taught me as a child." She said pulling the tray out of the oven.

"The smell yummy, mommy." Amy said with a big smile on her face.

"Well thank you baby girl. You know, i'm making a second batch if you girls wanna help me? It's a four person recipe." Her mother said smiling down at them.

"I want my apron." Rachel said looking at her mother's.

"Okay, go get it. Hurry, we don't want to start with out you baby Berry!" She said as Rachel jumped and hauled her small body into her room to find her apron in her play area, next to her play kitchen.

"Okay, mommy, i'm ready! Can we shape them like stars? I like stars!" Rachel asked seeing her favorite cookie cutter on the counter.

"We sure can. Are you two okay with stars?" Shelby asked Haley and Amy.

"Sure." Amy said.

"Fine." Haley replied too.

"Okay, let the fun begin!" Shelby said pouring the flour on the cookie sheet.

Rachel remembered that by the time they were all finished, they covered in flour, and small bits of cookie dough. The sides of their mouths had chocolate on them from sneaking one or two chocolate chips in their mouths when their mother wasn't looking. The part that Rachel favored the most was when her mother let her step up on a stool and held her hands in hers as they mixed the dough in the bowl together. When they would mix the dough together, they would sing row, row, row your boat.

Rachel had to try to distract herself from that memory now. She was becoming to emotional. Maybe now was the time to call everyone who was supposed to know that she was here. It's not like she would be getting any news soon. Today was a busy day in the hospital.

Pulling out her phone, she went straight to her contacts, finding the person who would comfort her's name, and hit call.

"Hello." Asked the voice.

"Hales."

"Rach, what's wrong? You sound like you're about to cry." Haley asked concerned through the phone.

"Umm, it's mom. She passed out this afternoon. She's in the hospital right now. I haven't found anything out yet, but it's bad Haley. I think this is it." Rachel explained through her sobs.

"Listen to me. I'll be there as fast as I can. Rach, I need you to stay strong for me. We're going to do this together, as a family. Hold on, I'll be right there. Bye." She said before she hung up.

Wiping the tears from her eyes, Rachel scrolled straight to the contact she needed to hear from the most.

"Rach?" The voice asked as it answered.

"Hi." She said with her voice breaking.

"Babe, what's the matter. Is everything okay?" Finn asked sounding worried about his wife.

"No..." She let out before she covered the phone with her hand and cried into her shoulder to block out the sounds. When she was finally ready to speak again, she placed her ear back into the phone, hearing Finn say her name over and over again, before she finally answered again.

"I'm here." She said.

"What's going on?" He asked.

"I'm at the hospital with my mom. She passed out when I went to visit her this afternoon. She unconscious. I think this is it Finn. I think my mom's gonna die soon." She said as she lightly sobbed into the phone.

"I'm leaving practice. You can't be alone right now. I'll be there in a few." He said and hung up before Rachel could say anything else.

Placing her phone back in her purse, she looked around the hospital at all of the nurses, and doctors. With all of the doctors in this hospital, why couldn't anyone just give her a small amount of information. Just something to let her know that her mother was doing okay. That's all she needed to know right now.

Letting out a deep sigh, Rachel took her phone out again to dial one more contact. She was dreading this phone call because she didn't exactly know how she would be able to say what she wanted to say to someone that she wasn't recently as close with as she was when she was younger. But like Haley said, they needed to do this together as a family. Hitting the call button, she waited. Getting no answer, she rolled her eyes and placed her phone back into her purse.

Being accompanied by Haley, Rachel ran up to her and wrapped her arms tightly around her.

"How is she?" Haley asked looking around.

"I don't know. No one's telling me anything." Rachel replied.

"Okay. Let's just sit down for now." Haley said grabbing the empty seat next to Rachel.

"Actually, I have to go do something. I won't be long. If i'm not here before Finn gets here, tell him I'll be here soon." Rachel said getting up with her purse.

"Okay?" She said looking confused.

"Thanks." She called before running out of the room.

Pulling into the driveway of the familiar two story brick house, Rachel parked her car behind the familiar Lexus that her sister owned. Getting out of her car, Rachel slowly walked to the side door, where she knew was the only door her sister ever answered. Ringing the doorbell, Rachel waited looking around the place. Rachel could see that she had her plants redid. They looked good this time of year. Taking her back to reality, Rachel was faced with a small blonde girl, who she recognized as her niece, Amy's youngest daughter, Callie.

"Hey Callie! Is your mom around?" Rachel asked with a high voice smiling at the child.

"Yes, she's upstairs. Come in." She said as Rachel walked into the neat house.

"Mommy! Someone's here!" Callie yelled at her mom upstairs.

"Okay. I'm coming." Rachel heard her older sister's voice say as she made her way downstairs.

Coming face to face with Rachel, Rachel could see the shock on Amy's face.

"What are you doing here?" She asked, not sounding to happy to see Rachel.

"I tried calling there was no answer. It's important." Rachel replied.

"Callie, honey, go upstairs for mommy." She said to her daughter.

"Okay" The little girl replied before she followed her mother's instructions.

"Look, I know we haven't been that close these past few years, but we need you, Ames." Rachel said looking at her sister who had her arms crossed over her chest.

"I don't remember telling you that you could visit." She replied with no emotion.

"Come on, Ames. Don't be like that." Rachel pleaded.

"Don't call me that!" She yelled.

"We need you Amy! This is it! Mom is in the hospital and you need to be there with us." Rachel said getting angry with her sister's attitude. "Come on, this could be your last chance."

"No. I already made it clear to them. I'm not getting involved. She gave up." Amy said backing away from Rachel.

"Come on, Amy you don't mean that. She's our mom. Our only mom. You can't push her away. She needs you!" Rachel said raising her voice.

"No. I don't need this and I don't want it. So, leave!" She said pointing towards the door.

"You know what, Amy? No. I'm so sick of you playing the victim! Mom has sacrificed her whole life for us, for you. When one little problem flies our way, you're just going to leave like that? Amy, you have no idea how bad she has it. You're making all of this about yourself. You're being selfish!" Rachel shouted at Amy.

"I'm not being selfish. I'm protecting my family from heart ache!" She yelled back.

"This has nothing to do with your family. She still believes that you'll come around, you know." Rachel said making Amy's teary eyes widen.

"Shut up! I don't want to hear it!" She said placing her hands over her ears.

"She told me that you were just a little busy. She told me that you were waiting for the right time to visit her. May God bless her heart, because we all know that's not the truth. You're being a selfish bitch, Amy. I give up. I tried. Don't come. Don't say goodbye. But when she does go, don't you dare come to me saying how much you regret it!" She said walking over to her sister placing a photograph on her counter.

The photograph was of her, Amy, Haley, and Shelby swinging together on a tire swing with laughter on their faces.

"Here,I brought this hoping to give you a reason to come. Where's that girl in that picture? Because we all really need her!" Rachel said as she started sobbing making her way out of the house and into her car.

When she returned to the hospital, she found Haley and Finn sitting in the waiting room. Joining them she sat beside Finn, as he placed his arm around her.

"Amy's not coming. I tried. But she refused." Rachel said wiping her tears away from her face.

"It's okay, Rach. She's got everyone she needs right here." Haley said.

"Did you guys hear anything yet?" She asked looking at the both of them.

"No, not yet. They are supposedly doing a surgery, but they won't tell us into their done." Haley replied.

"I can't be in here anymore." Rachel said quickly standing up from her seat.

"Hey, everything's going to be fine, Rach." Finn said joining her.

"No it's not, Finn. Nothing's going to be fine." She replied a little harshly.

"I know." he frowned.

"Look, I didn't mean it to come out that way, baby. I just had a really bad day, and I can't stand being in here any longer." She said hugging him.

"how about we go for a walk around the hospital to clear your mind?" He suggested.

"Okay." She said grabbing her purse. "Haley, My phone is on me. Call me if you find out anything." She said before they walked away.

After they had been walking around the sidewalk of the hospital for what seemed like forever, Rachel couldn't take the silence anymore. She could also tell that it was bothering Finn too.

"It's such a shame. Such beautiful weather on such a terrible day." Rachel said looking up at the sky as she held her sweater close to her.

"Maybe it's God's way of saying that today will be okay." Finn said walking beside her with his hands in his pockets.

"Finn, I've given up on that thought long ago." Rachel replied.

"On what thought?" He asked again.

"Both." She said blankly.

"Rachel, you know that's not true." Finn said with a tone of sympathy in his voice.

"Look, my mom is suffering. She has been for the past few weeks. If there was a God up there, don't you think he would have done something by now?" She asked with anger in her voice.

"He is doing something, Rach. He's calling for her to his kingdoms. She'll love it." Finn said looking at short brunette woman, who now had tears in her eyes.

"I don't wanna talk about this anymore. It's too sad." She said looking away from him as she wiped yet another loose tear.

"Come on. This hospital has ice cream. I'll bet the vanilla tastes amazing." He said trying to cheer her up as they make their way over to the hospital cafeteria.

After getting their ice cream, Rachel and Finn decided to sit down at a small booth and eat together. After about twenty minutes of eating and sharing small chat, Rachel's phone loudly rang on the table. Looking at the caller id, Rachel answered it as fast as she could.

"Hales, did you get any news?" She asked sounding worried.

"Umm, yeah. She's up for visiting hours, so if you guys wanna come back, we can see her now." She said sounding like she was hiding something.

"Okay. We'll be right there." She replied before she hung up and grabbed her things from the table.

"She's ready for visitors. Come on." She said as they walked to where she was.

Getting into the room, she sighed with relief when she saw her mom sitting up in the bed talking to Haley. Although she was awake, Shelby also didn't look to great. She was very pale and she looked weak as ever.

"Hey baby girl!" Shelby said when Rachel entered the room with Finn following behind her. "And there's my handsome baby son in law."

"Hey momma." She sniffled through her tears.

"Hey, no crying today. We all need smiles today, okay?" She asked looking at Rachel from across the room.

"I was just so worried about you." she said getting closer to where her mom was.

"I know, sweetheart. I admire you for being so strong . You remind me so much of your dad, you know that?" She asked smiling at Rachel.

"I'm so, so, so sorry, momma. I didn't mean to yell at you like that, and when I found you like that. I didn't want you to leave mad at me. I wouldn't be able to live with myself if those were the last things..." She couldn't finish before she sobbed into her mom's side. Her and Haley were both laying on the sides her of their mom just like they did when they were small children.

"Rachel, stop it. I'm not mad at you. I could never be mad at you. You neither, Haley. We are all on edge right now. Sometimes we need to let it out. It's okay that you did. It shows me that you're human. We all are. Don't you ever think for one second Haley Bob and Rachel Barbra, that I'm mad at you, because i'm not. I love you girls too much too hold grudges. You girls are my babies. All three of you. Even though we can't all be together right now, I still love Amy just as much. I always will." Shelby explained holding her daughters close to her side.

"I went to her house mom. I told her that she needed to be here, but she refused." Rachel said through her tears.

"It's okay. She's just a little scared right now. I know her more than anyone. Listen, if she doesn't make it in time, tell her..." They didn't let her finish.

"Mom!" Haley exclaimed.

"Don't say that mom. Don't!" Rachel exclaimed as well through her sobs.

"I don't want to have to say it, but I do. She needs to know. If I don't make it, let her know that I love her very much and that she means the world to me and I will be in her heart." Shelby explained through her own tears.

"You can just tell me now."

"Amy?" Rachel asked.

"Oh sweetie I knew you'd come!" Shelby smiled as she slowly walked into the room.

"Well, I certainly didn't wanna miss the family gathering." She said sarcastically.

"Amy!" Haley shouted correcting her.

"I'm sorry. What I really wanted to come here to say was that I was sorry. I know that I haven't been the best daughter or sister lately, but if you may, I would like to ask for your forgiveness." She said with sobs flying out.

"Come here." Rachel said.

Walking over to the hospital bed, Rachel pulled Amy into a warm embrace, being joined in by Shelby and Haley. Their family was together again.

"I'm so happy. My girls have finally came together." Shelby said looking at Finn and mouthing "Thank God". Making Finn laugh.

"Gammy!"

"Jimmy Jam! I knew you'd be here sooner or later." Shelby said smiling down at Jamie.

"I brought you this. I hope you like it. I made it just for you!" the little boy smiled handing Shelby a paper.

"Can you explain to me what is?" She asked smiling at Jamie.

"Sure." He said getting up on the bed with her.

"This here is a picture of you and me holding hands in the blue sky. Look those are the flowers that I made for you. I made them blue because momma told me that was your favorite color. The sun is smiling down on us too!" He explained as Shelby just watched and admired his excitement in the picture.

"What's this?" She asked pointing to two light blue objects.

"Those are your wings. Momma told me you were going to be an angel soon. Angels need wings." Jamie explained.

"Yes, yes they do." Shelby said turning away trying to hide her tears from Jamie.

How about we give you three a little alone time?" Rachel asked Haley, Jamie, and Shelby before walking out of the room.

"Rachel! Wait up! What's the matter?" Finn called behind her as she stopped running and turned around.

"This." She said handing him a piece of paper. "I found it on the table. Finn, it's her funeral arrangements." She said being pulled in by Finn as she sobbed into his chest.

"You know, I thought that I had gotten everything out. The tears, the pain. I thought that I could do this. I thought I was ready. But, I can't do this, Finn! I'm not ready to let her go. It's too soon!" She said as she sobbed.

"I know, baby, I know.. Shhh.." He said looking at the ground as her held her head in his hands.

"It's just that everything's falling apart. I need her in my life. She's the one I go to when I need advice on how to be a good wife. She's the one I go to when I want someone to laugh with, or to cry with. I go to her for everything. Without her, i'm lost. What's going to happen when we have a child in the future and I don't know how to be a good mom? Who am I going to go to for that? She's the only one." Rachel cried.

"Hey, look at me. I will be here for you, Rach. I'm not going anywhere, and neither is Haley, or Amy. You're mother's still going to look down on you. And even if you can't see her, she'll be there with you." Finn explained wiping away her tears.

"I love you so much, Finn Hudson." She said pulling him into a tight embrace.

"I love you too. Like you can't even imagine." He replied.

"Is it okay if I go back with them?" She asked.

"Yes. Of course. I'll give you your space. I'll be in the waiting room if you need me." He said.

"Okay." She answered before she walked back into the hospital room with just her mom in it.

"Hey. Where is everyone?" She asked looking around.

"Haley had to take Jamie home, and Amy said she would go get Callie to bring to the hospital. Where'd you go?" She asked looking at her.

"I went step outside, I was feeling light headed. Mom, I really need a heart to heart right now. So, please, can you just talk to me?" She asked looking at her with pleading eyes.

"Of course. What's on your mind?" She asked scooting over so Rachel could join her.

"I feel lost. I just, I'm not ready. I thought at this point I would be, but I'm not. And I know this isn't what you want to hear right now, but I needed to tell you, because I feel like if I don't I will regret it. I know it's negative energy, but I really need someone to talk to about this." Rachel explained to her mother.

"It's okay, sweetheart. I know. I saw it in your eyes today. Don't worry I feel the same way." Shelby said playing with her daughter's hair.

"When I look back at all of the memories we have, most of them originate from my childhood. It's like those are the only ones we have. I want more." Rachel said.

"We do have recent memories. You're wedding. Now, that was a blast. Or, that Christmas, remember? That was funny!"

"It was" Rachel agreed.

"Whenever you feel that you need me, or you miss me, just go outside, and look up, and start jabbering away, because I promise you I'll be listening. Daddy and I will both be listening. Just look up at the stars and say whatever is on your mind." Shelby assured her.

"But what if it's day time?" She asked looking concerned.

"There are still stars during the day time, you just can't see them." Shelby explained to her.

"There's just so many things that I haven't been able to say or do yet. I don't even have you're secret cookie recipe." She added.

"Well, give me a pen and a paper and I'll give it to you." Shelby sat up.

"Here" She said handing her the pen and paper.

After listening to her mother explain the recipe and write down, detail after detail, Rachel rested her head on her mom and they both fell asleep. When they woke up, the lights were turned off and everyone was in the room. There seemed to be some sort of night light and a overhead projector in the room that Jamie had set up for his grandma. Getting out of the bed, Rachel walked over to Finn and held onto him as Jamie began to play the slideshow.

From the beginning to end Rachel wanted to just sit there and cry. Every single picture involved at least some sort of memory for Rachel. Whether it was from when she and her sisters were very small or when they were teenagers. Rachel smiled as a picture of her and Finn popped up from their wedding. She can't believe that they had saved that picture. By the end of the video, Rachel needed a box of tissue, as did Amy, Haley, and even Finn. It was very emotional.

"This is perfect. Just what I wanted. All of my family sticking close by together." She whispered smiling.

"I love you mom." Haley said.

"I love you, momma" Rachel added.

"I love you, mommy." Amy added in too.

"I love you all too. I always will."

* * *

**Hope everyone likes this chapter. I tried really hard not to cry writing it, lol. Oh, and sorry if anyone gets offended by my reference to God and all that stuff. I'm Catholic so yeah, I decided to put that in there to make it more emotional. Anyways, I really hope you all liked it, and please Review! :)**


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6**

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It was an early Tuesday morning. The sky was it's darkest shade of grey. The weather was absolutely freezing outside with rolls of thunder and lightening here and there. Every now and then there were light showers. There wasn't a flower in sight or a chirp to be heard from birds in the sky. That cold and dark Tuesday morning was the day that she left them...

Finn was abruptly awoken by the sound of his wife's hysterical cries coming from downstairs at around 5:30 that morning. Basically running downstairs, he found her on the floor. The house phone was missing it's batteries and Rachel was holding herself with her arm as the tears drained the life out of her.

Seeing her like this broke his heart. His wife meant everything to him and it hurt him so much to see that her heart had just shattered into a million pieces. He wished there was something more he could do to make all of her pain go away.

Placing himself next to her, he replaced her arms with his as he pulled her into his chest to allow her to cry into him. Holding her as tight as he could, he sat there and rocked her back and forth, assuring her that he wouldn't go anywhere and that everything would be okay. Even though he knew it wouldn't be for a long time.

Sitting up in her bed, Rachel rubbed her eyes as she heard loud bangs of thunder through her window. Looking over her shoulder, the small red numbers read 10:34 am. This wasn't normal for her. She never slept past 7:00 am. Looking out the window, Rachel wiped away loose tears as everything from early this morning came rushing back to her. Grey sky, just what Rachel needed. It suited her mood and feelings perfectly. Deeply inhaling, she began to break down again. She missed it. The smell of her mother's perfume, her beautiful smile, and most of all her contagious laugh. If she had to be honest, that part about her was what she missed the most.

Getting up from her bed, she went downstairs to find Finn sitting on the couch watching the sports channel, football to be exact. Rachel really wanted to be alone right now, so she silently tip-toed past the living room and into the kitchen, trying to not get his attention.

Walking into the kitchen, Rachel saw the broken phone on the table. Picking it up, she buried her face into her arm and cried again. Maybe this time even harder. She remembered the last time she touched that phone. It was a terrifying memory of hers that would be planted in her brain for the rest of eternity.

Fixing her usual cup of morning coffee, Rachel decided to sit on the floor, against one of the many cabinets in her kitchen. For about one hour, she sat there, occasionally taking sips, doing nothing but staring ahead of her. If only the world wasn't such a dark and cruel place, Rachel thought to herself. Feeling the tears build up in her painful, swollen eyes, Rachel wiped them away which was the fifth time she cried today.

Being accompanied by Finn in the kitchen, she sat quietly on the floor, as he did not notice she was there. Walking around the corner of the island, he spotted her and jumped a little.

"Gosh, Rach. You scared me.. What are you doing on the floor?" He asked looking down at her sad face looking down at her now empty coffee mug.

"I don't know. It seemed umm, more comfortable." She whispered back not making eye contact with him.

"I would do the same thing.. You know, with this terrible weather we've been having today.." He said with a small chuckle trying to get her to laugh. It wasn't working. She remained in the same emotionless expression.

Picking up his dirty dishes in the dishwasher, he turned around and sat next to her on the floor. Looking at her, Rachel had her hand on her chin and was trying to hide her tears from Finn. She did nothing but looked the other way.

Grabbing her hand in his, he took a deep breath and began to speak.

"I know this is really hard for you, baby. But, just know that you're not alone. I'm here. I love you so much and it kills me to see you like this." He said looking at her as she finally looked back into his eyes.

"Thank you." She lightly let out through her muffled tears. She grabbed his hand back and placed her head on his shoulder.

"You can let it out in front of me. Don't be afraid." He said and with those words she broke down. Her voice became hoarse as she cried as loud as she could.

"This is not fair! We've never done anything to deserve this. She didn't deserve this, Finn!" She cried.

"I know. I know." He whispered holding her tight as she thrashed around with her cries. "Everything's going to be okay, I promise."

After Rachel calmed down, she placed her head back against Finn's shoulder, clinging to him as tight as she could.

"Her funeral is on Thursday..." She whispered staring straight ahead of her. "After the ceremony, she wanted to have her ashes spread into a pond. But umm, I don't think I can watch someone spread all that's left of my mother into some body of water." She said looking at Finn with sad eyes.

"Rach. It's what your mom wanted. You can do it. Even if you can't, I'll be standing right next to you. You're not alone in this." He said looking back at her.

"Yeah..." She said sarcastically.

"I know this is a bad time to bring all of this up but, I was just wondering when you're going to return back to school?" He asked looking at her expressionless face.

"It's okay. Umm, I don't know. Maybe tomorrow or the next day. I can't stay out too long. My students need me." She whispered.

"Okay. Are you sure you are gonna be okay going back this early?" he asked looking at her with a concerned expression on his face.

"Umm yeah." She faked a smile. "I'm going back to sleep." She said getting up from the floor.

"Okay. I'll be down here if you need me."

"Ok." She said rushing up the stairs. When she finally got to her room, She closed the door and locked it. Walking over to her bed, she fell into it. Screaming into her pillow, making sure Finn couldn't here her.

Getting up, she walked to her purse, collecting her cell phone. Pulling it out, she called the number on the contact list.

"Hey mom. I know this isn't exactly the most accurate way of talking to you, but I feel like you can hear this way. I just needed some sort of escape I guess. I don't know. It's been so hard today. The realization that I'm never going to here your laugh or you voice ever again, it kills me. Everything has just been so crazy, you know? I mean I saw you yesterday, and now you're gone? How does that even work? I know I shouldn't be complaining about all of this, you're probably really happy up there with dad. It's just that... I'm not happy down here. I cannot wake up every morning and come face to face with the fact that you're no longer here. It felt like a whole in my heart this morning when I woke up.. How do you think it's going to be every other morning for the rest of my life? I can't live with that. You went too soon, and I wasn't ready to let you go. Hell, I'm still not ready. But that's just God's plan, huh?"

"Rach?" A familiar voice called knocking on the door.

"I got to go, mom. I'll call you later." she said quickly hanging up the phone and unlocking the door.

"Who were you talking to in there?" Finn asked looking at her with a confused look.

"I was.. umm, praying.." She said coming up with an excuse.

"Oh. Anyways, Mom and Burt wanted to know if we would join them for dinner tonight. I told them it was up to you. If you're not up for it, we don't have to..." Finn was cut off by Rachel.

"Yeah. Let's go. I don't wanna be stuck in this house anymore." She said backing up from the door so Finn could enter.

"Okay. I'll go call them and tell them." He said walking out of the door.

"Okay. I'll be getting ready." She said walking into the bathroom.

When they arrived at the Hudson/Hummel home, Rachel and Finn were greeted by Burt and Carol.

"Oh, sweetie, come here. I'm so sorry Rachel. Are you okay, honey?" Carol asked pulling Rachel into a tight hug.

"Mom!" Finn exclaimed. "Don't smother her."

"It's okay, Carol. Thanks.. I'm doing fine.." She smiled going in for another hug from Carol, her mother-in-law. When Rachel's face was facing Carol's back, her smile was completely wiped from her face, being replaced by an expressionless face. When Carol finally released, Rachel quickly threw the smile back on her face.

"Is Kurt here?" Finn asked.

"Did someone say my name?" The familiar voice said walking into the room.

"Kurt! Hey man!" Finn exclaimed running over to his brother.

"Hey Finn!" Kurt exclaimed back as he gave him a bear hug.

"Rachel!" Kurt said pulling from Finn to go to his old high school best friend.

"Hey, Kurt." She said politely smiling. She wasn't in a cheerful mood.

"Come here, diva. Long time, no see." He said wrapping his arms around her. "I heard about your mom, Rachel. I'm so sorry."

"It's okay, Kurt. Thanks for your condolences. They're deeply appreciated." She said looking up at him with her swollen eyes and smiled a warm smile at him.

"Are they done in the kitchen? I'm starving!" Carol asked Kurt.

"Wait. Who's they?" Finn asked his mother looking at Kurt and Carol with a confused look on his face.

"Sorry, I forgot to tell you. I invited some guests. Hope you guys don't mind." Kurt said with a bright smile on his face.

"Kurt.. Rachel can't handle.." Finn started.

"No, Finn it's okay.. It's better to be around people than to be cooped up alone in my room. Is the food ready? Like Carol said, I'm starving!" She exclaimed heading into the dining room with Kurt.

"That was totally unexpected.." Carol said looking at Finn with a confused look.

"I know. It's her own spin on her grieving process. She's been like that all day. One minute she's crying so hard, the next she's trying to cover it all up. It's been so hard for her this past month. It's very sad." Finn explained to his mother.

"I bet it has been. But you're lucky, Finn. You got yourself a strong one over there. Because if that was me, I wouldn't have even come." Carol told her son.

"She gets it from Haley." Finn said smiling at his mom.

"How is she? How are the other two?" Carol asked.

"Haley's doing good, she's staying sane for the two. Amy's doing just about the same as Rachel. Haley's been checking in on them both, so they'll be fine. I know they will. It's just going to take time." Finn said looking down at his shoes.

"Well, you know I'll be praying for all of them and for you." She said pulling her son in for a hug.

"Thanks, mom. I love you." he smiled.

"I love you too. Now, let's get to the table before all of the good food is gone!" She said guiding Finn to the dining room.

"Hey, sweetie." Finn smiled sitting in the chair next to Rachel.

"Hey." She barely smiled as she grabbed in hand in hers.

"Are you doing okay? How do you feel? Do we need to go? Because if we do, I'm okay with it." Finn babbled on.

"Finn, I'm fine. Don't worry about me." She smiled playing with his fingers,

"Okay. I love you, you know that?" He said smiling at her makeup-less face. Even without makeup on, she looked like a beautiful princess in a fairy tale.

"Okay, guys. I would like to welcome my guests who came all the way from New York City. You all know them so don't get to excited.. I just wanted to give them a proper introduction." Kurt announced by the door to the kitchen. "By the way they've cooked the meal you're going to eat tonight, so everyone please give a warm welcome to Quinn Fabray and Santana Lopez!" Kurt exclaimed as they both came in through the kitchen door.

Rachel's heart fell to the ground. When she heard that first and last name, she practically almost stopped breathing. Maybe Finn was right. Maybe she wasn't ready for this... Losing her mom and seeing the person who made her life pure hell for four years of her life in one day? There must've been some sort of record for the worst day ever, that she had just accomplished. "Stop it, Rachel. You're mom would want you to be the better person. Don't break. You can do this. You're fine. Everything's fine." She thought to herself.

"Rachel!" Quinn exclaimed running towards her seat at the table. "Gosh, I've missed you!"

Rachel slowly got up and threw her arms around Quinn. "I've missed you too, Quinn. More than you know." She said hiding her emotionless face behind Quinn trying to sound happy.

"Yo, Frankenteen! Get your tall ass up and give me a hug!" Santana said moving towards Finn.

"Hi Santana!" Finn exclaimed feeling happy to see his old friends from high school.

"Okay, guys. Back to business here. Let's all eat!" Kurt clapped his hands together as Santana and Quinn joined them at the dinner table. Rachel became nervous when Santana took the chair straight across from hers. Looking down at her hands in her lap, trying to avoid eye contact with Santana. She knew she was already staring her down like a hawk.

"Okay, guys. Before we all get started, can we please say grace?" Quinn asked the table.

"Sure" everyone replied.

"Umm, Quinn, if it's okay with you, can I sit this one out? I'm just not on the best terms with the man upstairs right now." Rachel said looking down at her plate.

"Yeah, sure.. It's okay." Quinn said with a shocked face. She then proceeded. When she was finished, everyone dug in, starting conversation with one another.

While everyone caught up and chatted with one another, Rachel pushed around her peas with her fork. It's not that she didn't want to talk with the people who joined her at the dinner table. She just wasn't up for it. This family gathering reminded her so much of Thanksgiving with her family last year. "Stop it, Rachel. Stop thinking about it. They can't see you cry. Be strong." She thought to herself. Quickly wiping away the tear that escaped her eye, Rachel reached for Finn's hand and squeezed it tight, letting him know that she wasn't doing too good right now.

"Do you wanna go home, babe?" he whispered while everyone else was busy with conversation.

"No. I just really need to hold your hand." She whispered back.

"Okay. Well hold on as tight as you need to. I'm right here." He said rubbing her back with the other hand.

"So, Rachel, I haven't seen you in a long time. How has your life been going?" Santana asked looking directly at Rachel with a loud obnoxious voice. She obviously still felt the same way about Rachel.

"Things couldn't be better, Santana." Rachel said in a sarcastic voice with a fake smile on her face.

"That's great. You know, my life is going great. Mercedes and I have finally started on the album we've been planning. How about singing Rachel? Do you still sing?" She asked sipping on her glass of red wine.

"Umm, no actually I don't. Well, not anymore. I just don't have the time. It's not as important as it used to be. I have other things on my mind." Rachel replied. She was becoming concerned. She didn't know what Santana's motive was.

"If you don't sing, then what do you do for a living?" She asked. This conversation now had the full attention of the full table. Looking around Carol, Burt, Quinn, Finn, and Kurt were all looking at her with sympathetic eyes. They must've told Quinn. Didn't they tell Santana too? She guessed not. She felt like she was in high school again. Becoming the only prey of the hungry lioness, Santana Lopez.

"I'm a literature teacher at McKinley High." She said lowly, squeezing Finn's hand even harder when Santana choked on her wine with what looked like laughter.

"A teacher? What happened to the old 'I'm going to Broadway and no one's gonna stop me'?" Santana asked making air quotes.

"I found the love of my life in this town. I realized that I needed to move on from that dream because I already had another waiting for me here." She answered back in a bold voice. "What about you, Santana? Do you have someone back in New York?" She asked with a small smile on her face.

"Not yet. I haven't started looking. I'm sure when I do there'll be line from Times Square to Jersey." She answered back.

"That's nice." Rachel replied.

"Oh yeah, Rachel, I forgot to ask. Why didn't you pray with us?" Santana asked, now having a mean look on her face.

"Santana, that's enough.." Finn said.

"No, let her speak. Why didn't you pray with us, Rachel?" Santana asked holding her hand out for Finn to be quiet.

"I already explained it, Santana. I'm not on good terms with God right now." Rachel answered, feeling her heart about to beat out of her chest.

"But that's not the answer I was looking for, Rachel. Why on Earth would you not be on good terms with God. Who in their right minds holds grudges against God?" Santana went on.

"Me! Okay? I hold grudges against God! But you wouldn't know the first thing about it, would you? Because for all of high school you've decided that you were gonna hate me and make my life a living hell. Which, you obviously didn't stop doing, as I can see now, with you playing the same old childish games from high school. Gosh, someone give her a slushie and maybe It could be just like high school all over again! You wanna know why I'm mad at God? Do you really?!" Rachel yelled across the table with tears dripping from her eyes.

"Yes!" Santana yelled back crossing her arms over her chest.

"Do you want me to explain the whole story, or should I just get straight to the point?" Rachel asked sarcastically.

"Whichever works for you, princess." she replied with a smirk on her face.

"Fine. This morning at around 5:30, God took my mom from me. But that's not the beginning. I already knew he was gonna take her. He gave her Cancer. Pancreatic. And when it's pancreatic, it's usually terminal. Well, her's was anyways. I spent a whole month watching her suffer. I spent a whole month saying goodbye to her. You honestly have no idea how hard it is to look into your own mother's eyes and know that she'll be leaving you soon! You honestly have no idea how many times I've cried in her arms. She was alive yesterday, and now, she's gone. So, Santana, to answer your question, I'm on bad terms with God, because he willingly took my mom away from me. I'm mad because I've prayed to him millions of times to make her all better, but not a single prayer was answered. There you have, Santana, there's your answer!" She sobbed at the table with everyone staring at her with pain filled eyes.

Getting up from the table, Rachel walked around to face the speechless Santana. Pulling her arm back, she slapped Santana across the face, making everyone gasp.

"That's for asking the damn question, bitch." She said before she turned around and walked out of the dining area. When she got to the front door she opened it and slammed it behind her.

"What did you do, Santana?" Kurt asked with a horrified expression.

"I didn't know, Kurt!" She said rolling her eyes.

"Yes you did.. Mrs. Hummel told us when we got here." Quinn said looking at Santana with a disgusted look on her face.

"I must've forgot.." She said looking down at her food.

"No you didn't Santana. You just wanted to use it against her. You should be really proud of yourself. You just made things worst than they already were." Finn said, getting up and throwing his napkin on the table. "You and I are no longer friends. Stay away from me and my family. You're no longer welcomed here."

"But, Finn..." Santana began.

"No. I mean it." Finn said then turned to run after Rachel.

Walking down the dark subdivision, the only lights that Rachel could see were the large street lights on every corner. Rachel really regretted not grabbing her coat. She was freezing. That didn't matter. All that mattered now was that she was alone and she didn't have to face Santana anymore. Rachel knew that Santana and her had their differences in high school, but Rachel thought that they had both grown up. How could she still be so cruel after all of those years. All she wanted to do at that moment was run to her mother's house and jump in her arms. She wanted to smell her mother's distinctive perfume and she wanted her to bake her famous chocolate chip cookies for her.

After walking around the subdivision one time, she heard her name being called by a familiar voice. Trying to avoid it, it just kept on getting closer and closer to her.

"Rachel? Rachel!" She heard as the voice came behind her.

Speeding up her pace, Finn caught up to her by running. She wanted to be alone right now. Why couldn't he understand that?

"What do you want, Finn?!" She yelled not realizing the tone in her voice.

"Look, I know you're pissed at Santana but no need to take it out on me." He said holding her shoulders.

"You're right. I'm sorry. I just, I thought I could handle tonight. But obviously not. We shouldn't have come." She said shaking and holding arms.

"Rachel, are you crazy? Here take my coat." He said placing his large jacket over her tiny body.

"Just take me home, Finn. I'm tired, and sad, and I just really wanna go home." She said walking to his chest and wrapping her arms around his stomach.

"Okay, baby. Let's go." He said wrapping his arm around her shoulder and holding her close as they walked back to the car.

When they arrived at their house it was midnight, which meant that if Rachel was going back to school tomorrow, she would be exhausted in the morning. Pulling into their long driveway, Finn Parked into the garage, and saw that Rachel was fast asleep in the passenger seat. Not wanting to wake her up, he quietly got out of the car, and walked over to her side. He opened the car door, unstrapped her seatbelt, and picked her up bridal style. Unlocking the front door and typing in their alarm code to the house, Finn closed and locked the door behind him, turned on the alarm system, placed his keys on the counter, and made his way upstairs with Rachel in his arms.

Getting to their bedroom, Finn placed Rachel on her side of the bed. He took off her shoes, and placed her under the sheets and big cover. Before he could walk away, he was stopped abruptly by Rachel's hand grabbing his arm.

Turning around to look at her, she sat up and started to speak.

"Please, lay with me. Don't go." She said looking at him with big sad brown eyes.

"Okay." He said going over to the other side of the bed.

Pulling her in close to him, she rested her head on his chest.

"How are you feeling baby? Do you feel better than this morning?" He asked looking up at the ceiling.

"Worse. I think this morning all of the pain was new and just seeping in. Now, it's like the pain has taken time to spread through my whole brain. I've gotten time to think of what's actually happened. Tonight didn't help at all." She explained.

"I know, angel. Santana shouldn't have asked that stupid question." He replied.

"I'm actually kind of glad she did. It gave me a chance to get some of my feelings off my chest. It also gave me an excuse to slap her. You don't know how hold I've waited to do that." She lightly chuckled.

"She deserved it.." Finn added.

"I know. But I forgive her. Even though it's really hard for me to do, I'm not gonna hold any grudges. You never know how fast you could lose someone." She said wiping away more stray tears from her eyes.

"I love you so much, Rachel Berry." Finn said kissing her cheek.

"It's Rachel Hudson. Rachel Hudson also loves Finn Hudson with all of her heart." She smiled playing with her wedding ring on her finger.

"I'm glad to know that, because without you, I don't know what I would do with my life." He said holding her hands in his.

"I'm glad you're here too, because without you here right now, I don't know how I would deal with all of this." She whispered back.

"Are you kidding me, Rachel. You've got the mental strength of a cage full of rowdy bulls." He said. "It's inspiring."

"And you're so humble and kind, Finn. You're the nicest person I know and I love you for it. You're inspiring."

"Rachel, you're the love of my life and not a second goes by that I ever regret marrying you in high school. I found my future way before my career even started." He said wrapping his arms around her.

"I love you, Finnegan Christopher Hudson, and I always will. Not a day will go by when I don't feel that way. You're my hero, my soul mate, and you're my best friend. That I know with all of my heart." She said looking into his amber eyes.

"Well, then, Mrs. Hudson, may I have this sleep?" He asked holding out his hand jokingly for her to take it.

"Yes you may." She smiled. Laying on his chest, Finn turned out the lights, and the terrible day was over.

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**Review!**


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7

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"Someone once told me that if we look past all of the tragedy and destruction in this world, we can find the magic that seeps beneath it. Well, here's what I think. There's no magic in this world. There never will be. I mean, you can believe that there is if you want, but to me there isn't. If there was, there wouldn't be suffering, or murder, or tragedy. If there was magic in the world, the sky would be sunny all of the time and everyone would be happy. But here's the problem, everyone around me thinks that this world is amazing and beautiful. While I think it's nothing but cruel. Today, everyone around me was sharing laughter and joking with each other, and I couldn't understand how they could be so happy, but then I remembered.. You know what? I don't have time for people like that. The happy ones... You know what? I hope I never hear another joke in my lifetime. But on the other hand, maybe it's not the world I hate, maybe it's myself. I don't feel anything anymore. I can't. When someone laughs I fake a smile, when someone hugs me, I pretend to hug them back, but I just don't feel anything towards them.. You can call me a terrible person if you want. I'm just done. I'm done with these people who try so hard to get me to speak, I'm done with being happy, and pretty soon, I'll be done with this life. I don't know, if things keep going the way they're going, I don't think I'll be able to take it." Rachel hung up her cell phone and placed it in her sock drawer.

It was now about a month since Shelby died and Rachel only felt worse. She wasn't the same person she was a month ago, and if you'd ask anyone else in her life, they'd tell you the same thing.

Getting up to the loud blare of her alarm through the room, Rachel turned it off and walked into the bathroom and locked the door. Turning on the shower, She got in and let the steaming water run over her body. After about another 35 minutes, Rachel finally got out and went to her closet to see what she would wear to school that morning. Not really caring, Rachel grabbed her favorite dress, which was flowy at the top with purple that went down to her waistline, where a black belt connected the black going all the way down to the end of the dress, which was right above her knee. With that, she grabbed her black business jacked and a pair of black pumps. Getting changed into her clothes, she blow dried her hair, straightened it, and put her makeup on. Quickly grabbing her bag from the closet, she hurried downstairs.

Getting down to the kitchen, Finn was standing in the kitchen, dressed in his normal school apparel, black track pants, a red McKinley High T-shirt, and a black Nike sports jacket with his black and white Nike running shoes and a whistle wrapped around his neck. Standing at the island, he was chopping up bananas and strawberries and placing them into the blender.

Getting into his eye sight, he finally noticed her. Which was her worst fear, she didn't feel like talking.

"Good morning, babe!" he smiled at her.

"Not really.." She whispered to herself.

"Huh?" He asked not knowing what she had just said.

"Umm, yeah you too." She replied in a monotone voice.

"Want a strawberry banana smoothie? It'll give you a good kick to start the day." He asked holding out the drink to her.

"No, thanks." She said walking over to his side to grab an unpeeled banana on the counter. "I have to go, see you later." She said then rushed off before they could share their daily kiss.

When Rachel closed the door behind her, Finn looked in her direction and whispered to himself "I love you, too."

Arriving into her class, Rachel sat down at her desk and placed her bag in the bottom drawer. Getting up from her chair, she wrote the day's assignment on the board, just as she had been doing for the past 2 years.

When the final bell rang for the students to come to class, Rachel clenched her jaw and fists to stop her fears of today's class. The first student, as usual, was Michele, who greeted Rachel with a shy smile, which Rachel didn't return. She hadn't returned it since she came back to school.

Students started filling up the classroom, until two empty seats were left. Jason and Jordan, as usual. The tardy bell had already rang, so they were late to class. Within the next five minutes, they both came running into class, one after the other.

"Late again? What's your excuses this time." She asked the two with her arms crossed over her chest.

"Here you go, Mrs. H." Jason handed her another note from Finn and walked over to his seat by Michele.

"Okay. What's your excuse, Jordan?" Rachel said looking at the cheerleader.

"Someone told me to go to hell. I couldn't find it at first. But now I'm here." She said smiling as the whole class laughed after.

"Well since you've found hell, I guess you won't have such a hard time finding detention." She replied. "Now, go sit down. Class is about to begin."

"Whatever." She mumbled and walked to her desk.

About halfway through her lesson, Rachel was interrupted by Jordan's hand going into the air, as if she had a question.

"What do you want, Jordan?" Rachel asked, sounding annoyed with Jordan, which she really was.

"Can I just take a moment to congratulate Michele on her look today? Michele, you make dressing like an old lady look fashionable.. For five year olds!" She laughed, getting the whole class to laugh with her.

"Class! That's enough." Rachel tried to calm them down but they ignored her. "Guys, we have to get back to class. Come on, guys.. Guys, Hush!" She tried her hardest but nothing would give, everyone just kept on laughing.

When the laughter died down, Rachel then began teaching again. The only one who was paying attention was Michele. Then, the noise started again. This time, it wasn't laughter, but it was the sound of all of the children chatting to their friends.

"Guys! Stop talking!" She yelled. No one listened.

"Okay, you know what, fine." She said, aggressively closing her expo marker and throwing it at the white board where she was teaching. "I so don't have time for this." She sarcastically smiled to herself.

With the whole class now staring at her, she went for her desk, opened the last drawer, grabbed her purse, and headed for the door. "If you all don't receive at least a c on your next test, I'm going to give you a failing grade for the semester, which means no extra curricular activities. So, Glee club, Football, Basketball, Cheerleading, Band, and whatever else, that's out of the picture! So, good luck, i'm so outta here." She said before she slammed the classroom door behind her and hurried outside to her car.

When she got home, she headed straight for the kitchen and put on her apron that was hanging by the refrigerator. Walking over to the fridge, she grabbed the small piece of paper hanging on it, and went through her fridge to find the right ingredients. Rolling out the dough on the counter, Rachel's phone started ringing in her purse, going over to it, she answered it.

"Hello?" She asked rolling the dough with the roller.

"Rachel? Where the hell are you?!" Finn yelled through the phone.

"I'm at home. Where else would I be?" She asked.

"Rachel, this isn't a joke. You could get fired for this. Just hurry and come back before any one notices." He said.

"No." She replied before she hung up.

Continuing to roll the dough, her phone rang again, causing her to roll her eyes.

"What?" She answered.

"Rachel, get your ass to this school, right now!" Finn hollered.

"I really don't appreciate your tone." She answered back.

"This isn't funny, Rachel. We can't afford this." Finn replied.

"It kind of is, considering how ridiculous you're being." She said placing the dough on a cookie sheet, while searching for her favorite cookie cutter. "Ah, here it is." She said over the phone when she finally spotted the star shaped cutter.

"I'm being ridiculous?" He asked with disbelief in his voice.

"Whatever. I got to go. The cookies are ready to go in the oven. Bye." She said into the phone before she once more hung up on him.

Placing the cookies in the oven, Rachel sat at the kitchen counter and went through the mail that she hadn't bothered to open from yesterday afternoon. Looking through all of it, Rachel rolled her eyes as most of it was for Finn. Being so concentrated in the search for mail for her, she was startled when her phone started to ring again. Walking over to it, she checked the caller id. When she saw his name flash on it for the third time, she walked over to the sink, plugged the hole, waited for the water to fill up, and threw her phone in the full sink.

Walking up the stairs, Rachel went into her bathroom, locked the door and sat on the floor, and started crying again. The crying soon turned into screaming, and then the screaming turned into cursing, until the cursing turned into muffled sobs against her knees, as she held her legs with her arms and rocked back and forth. Finally getting up from the floor, she walked over to her vanity and sat down. Looking at her teary eyed reflection in the mirror, she finally started to speak.

"Oh, it's all gonna be okay, Rachel. You're gonna be fine. It doesn't matter if this whole world is crumbling beneath your feet, you're just gonna have to suck it up. No crying, smile, make it believable. Die inside so others can be satisfied with your happiness. You're gonna be okay, Rachel. Laugh, sing, smile. Crying shows weakness. They don't want that. You're gonna be just fine.." She went on, looking at herself, speaking in a sarcastic tone, which made her cry even more.

"Well, you know what? I can't do it, mom! I can't pretend that you're here with me, because trust me, you're not. You told me that you would always be in my heart. It doesn't feel that way! Everyday we just sit down and tell ourselves that it's all just gonna be okay. But it's not! At least it's not when you're gone." She cried placing her head on the desk and crying into her arms.

When Finn got home, he was surprised when the house seemed pretty much empty. Walking into the kitchen, there was no one in there, but there was some sort of smell, like something was burning. Opening the oven, he was taken aback by all of the smoke pouring out of it. Getting the fire extinguisher, he sprayed the oven, until most of the smoke was gone. Getting an oven mitten, he grabbed the tray and placed in on the stove. On the tray, their were small burnt objects shaped like stars. Sighing when he saw them, he turned off the oven and headed upstairs.

"Rachel?" He asked looking around his room. He saw that the bathroom light was on. Trying to turn the knob, he wasn't surprised when the door was locked.

"Rachel, open the door." No answer.

"Rachel?" She still didn't answer. He began to get worried.

"Rachel!?" He yelled still no answer. He then decided to go in. 1, 2, 3 he thought to himself, before he threw his body against the door to open it. With the door flying open, Finn's heart fell to his toes when he saw Rachel sitting at her vanity, with her head resting against the table.

"Rachel, baby please wake up!" He yelled violently shaking her.

Being startled her head flew up, as she looked at him with confused eyes.

"Do you have any idea how worried you made me just now?!" He yelled at her.

"Why? Because I fell asleep in the bathroom?" She asked crossing her arms over her chest.

"No. Because you pulled an idiotic stunt, and didn't answer all of my one hundred calls! What were you thinking, Rachel? How could you have been so stupid?" He yelled.

"You know what? I'm not doing this. Whatever you're trying to do here, i'm not doing it. Excuse me." She said trying to walk away.

"No, we need to talk about this, Rachel." he stopped her.

"Okay. Fine. You wanna talk? Let's talk. Yes, Finn. I was so stupid today, okay?! But, what's the point of teaching a classroom full of kids who don't even pay attention? Huh, or what's the point of being in that classroom when all those kids do is cut up and disrespect me? Tell me, because I honestly don't know it." She started to raise her voice at him.

"It doesn't matter, Rachel. It's still you're job. You're their teacher, you have to teach them no matter what. This isn't about the students, is it?" He said looking at her angered expression.

"Don't say it. Don't you dare say it, Finn." She yelled pointing her finger at him.

"All of this is about your mom. Rachel, it's been a month..." He started.

"This conversation is over!" She screamed and ran past him.

Following her, he spoke again. "Rachel, we still need to talk about this."

"No, you know what? You have no right! How dare you tell me that I need to move on, Finn! You watched me cry. You saw how messed up I was over it! I can understand how Santana would push me to my limits over this, because she didn't know, but you? You knew! You held me while I cried! We cried together! You have no idea what i'm going through!" She yelled crying with tears streaming down her eyes.

"Rachel, i'm sorry.. It's just... You're right, I don't understand what you're going through.. But you won't let me! This past month, it's like you've been pushing me away. Rachel, I need you to let me in! We can face this together." He said getting closer to her, pulling her in his arms. "I need you to let me in.."

"No! Get away from me!" She screamed and pushed him away. Running back up the stairs, she went into her closet, and started grabbing her purse and car keys.

"Rachel! Where are you going?" He asked following closely behind her, as she moved downstairs and to the front door in a hurried pace.

"Out." She said and slammed the door behind her.

Falling to the floor against the wall, Finn placed his head in his hands and started to cry.

Pulling up to the Ohio Pub, Rachel got out and slowly walked into the bar, feeling a little awkward since the only time she ever came her was when her and Finn got engaged and came her to celebrate.

"Well look who decided to show her face!" The bartender called, who Rachel recognized instantly with his distinctive Mohawk on the top of his head.

"Hey, Puck." She smiled walking over to the bar.

"What brings you in here, Berry. And where's my main man?" He asked looking at her.

"Mmm, your main man's the reason i'm here. We had a fight. So, keep the rounds coming so I can wash away all of my sorrows in the sweet taste of lime and tequila." She smiled resting her head against her hand.

"Well, I can't exactly refuse the queen's orders, can I?" He asked with a light chuckle.

"No, you can not!" She laughed.

After about 7 rounds, Rachel was drunk off of her ass, and was still asking for more.

"Bartender, Hit me!" She yelled and laughed again.

"Here you go.." He said pouring another shot and handing her more limes.

"Thanks, Puckerman!" She loudly laughed and shot the drink down her throat with the lime following.

"You're welcome." He said, becoming worried about her.

"More!" she yelled banging her fist against the table.

"Okay. Hold on. I need to get another bottle from the storage." He said walking towards the back and pulling out his cellphone to make a call.

After about another 10 minutes of Rachel's loud laughter and conversation with random strangers in the bar, the door to the bar burst open, revealing a panicked Finn behind it.

"Hey, man." Puck said walking up to Finn.

"Where is she?" He asked looking around the room.

Pointing to the bar, Finn spotted Rachel who was laughing and talking to some guy on the side of her.

"Thanks." He said before her started towards her.

"No problem, man.." He said returning to his job.

Approaching Rachel, he sat beside her, and waited for him to notice her. The man she was talking to him noticed that Finn was sitting next to her and watching them. He was obviously flirting with her, even though her diamond wedding ring was totally visible.

"And then I was like, i'm so done with this, and I just walked out of the..." Rachel didn't get to finish her story before the man interrupted her.

"Hey, man, what the hell you staring at? Go find your own girl. I saw her first." He yelled. He was obviously drunk.

Calling Rachel's attention to Finn, she looked surprised.

"Hey, man, why don't you go get another beer and stop flirting with my wife. And to be honest, I actually saw her first. Now get lost before it turns ugly. I'm sober, you're obviously not." He stood up looking at the guy with black hair and green eyes.

"Bye Rachel, it was nice talking to you." He said standing up and walked away.

"Bye, umm, whatever your name is." She called after him but he didn't here her.

"Come on, we're going home." Finn said grabbing her arm.

"No! You can't make me." She said crossing her arms over her chest.

"You wanna bet?" He asked. He then grabbed her and threw her over his shoulder.

"Finn! Put me down!" She screamed as he started walking out of the bar.

"Hey Puck, I'll pay tomorrow." He called out.

"Okay." Puck called back while sweeping the floor.

"Finnegan Christopher Hudson, if you don't put me down right now!" She yelled.

"Fine." He lightly placed her on the ground in front of his truck. When she almost fell over, he knew that she was too drunk, so he led her to the passenger side.

"Finn, I'm not getting in this truck!" She yelled, wobbling around him.

"Up you go." He said as he picked her up and placed her in the seat and strapped her in. Closing the door, he walked around as she screamed at him through the soundproof windows in the truck.

When he got in the driver's seat, he closed the door, as she just looked at him as he placed his seatbelt on and turned on the car. While driving down the dark road, Finn looked at Rachel, who had both of her arms crossed, and was facing the other way.

"Look, I know you're mad at me." He began.

"You're damn right!" she began to sob. "Why did you come? I was doing perfectly fine without you!" She yelled.

"Because, I'm your husband." He replied.

"What does that have to do with anything?" She asked.

"It's my job. I came because I care too much about you..." With silence in the car, he continued. "Rachel, I didn't know where you were for 2 whole hours. Do you realize how scared that made me? I know that's your sad about your mom, but I can't imagine what would happen if you left me too. I can't lose you, Rach." He said wiping away his tears. Hearing no response, he looked over to see her fast asleep. "Sleep well, angel." he cried placing her hair behind her ears.

When they got home, Finn placed Rachel in the bed and turned to go downstairs. Before he got to the door, he heard her speak. "Finn, wait." Maybe she had heard everything he said in the car to her.

"Yeah?" he asked smiling at her, as she sat up in the bed.

"I just, I have something I want to tell you." She looked into his eyes.

"What do you want to tell me?" He asked, looking at her. He thought she was so beautiful in the dark room.

Looking him deep in the eyes, her face went blank, and her lips began to move.

"I hate you."

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	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter 8**

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"I hate you." she said, before she turned around and went to sleep.

Closing the door behind him, he ran down the stairs and collapsed on the couch. Holding himself with his arms, he just let go. The tears fell like rain as he felt his heart shatter into a million pieces. How could she tell him that? He loved her with all of his heart. He thought she felt the same. At least that's what she told him a while back. He felt like he had his heart ripped out. But worse than that, it was by her.

Sitting on the couch, he looked over to shelves by the T.V and then he saw it. He saw the picture of the glorious moment that defined him for the rest of his life. The picture explained just how he felt that day. He had a big smile on his face, he wore a black tux, and a silver ring on his left hand. Finn smiled when he looked at the perfect person standing next to him. She had the biggest smile ever, she wore a big, beautiful white dress, her hair pulled up in a neat way, and a white veil hung from the back of her head. And where she had her hand on his chest, you could see her beautiful diamond ring. They were both very happy on that day, he missed it.

Grabbing the picture from the shelf, he went over to the couch and wiped his eyes as he stared at it.

_"People say that you never really live your life until you find the right person to live it with. To be honest, if you would've asked me if that was true a few years ago, I probably would've told you that you were crazy for believing it. But, today I stand here and promise you that it is true. Before I met Finn, I was just a girl. I didn't have many friends, I had never kissed a boy, and I didn't believe in myself. When I first laid my eyes on you, I knew for sure that I was done. I knew that I had found my husband. And the funny thing is, when this all went down you had no idea who I was." Rachel had gained a laugh from the crowd. "I remember the first time we ever sang to each other in Glee club. He claims I freaked him out, but I know that he secretly enjoyed it. Building our relationship wasn't the easiest thing, I have to admit. But when you really love someone like I loved Finn, you could wait a lifetime. Finn Hudson, i'm very glad that I stuck to my instincts and hunted you down, because no other guy on this planet could compare to you. You are my life, my family, my hero, my soul mate, and my very, very best friend. When I look at you, I know that what we have will last for all of eternity, and even after, I will still love you with all of my heart. You were the first boy to make me feel wanted, appreciated, sexy, and loved, and I want more than anything for you to be my last. My love will never waver, I will not be selfish with you, and I will love you way beyond the point of my last dying breath. This, I vow today, in front of all of our friends and family. I love you so much, Finn Hudson." As she wiped away her loose tears, she smiled up at him, who had a warm smile on his face._

Thinking of her words over and over again, Finn knew that Rachel didn't hate him. At least, he convinced himself that she didn't. Rachel was buried deep in a tunnel of depression, Finn had already noticed that. So, now all he could do was be the loving husband that he promised to be on the altar, and to be there for her no matter what. Placing a blanket over him, he fell asleep on the sofa that night.

Waking up the next morning very early, he got up, got dressed, and went into the kitchen to get things prepared for Rachel when she woke up. Even though she had told him those three words last night, he was going to try his hardest to forget about what she said. Going through the cabinet, he was going to make her favorite breakfast for her. He pulled out the box of cocoa puffs. Getting to the fridge he got the milk and placed it on the counter. Finding her favorite bowl, he poured the cereal and mild into the bowl. He then made a pot of coffee and cut up some berries, just how she like it, and placed them on the side of the bowl of cereal.

Looking at his watch, it was 5:55, which meant that Rachel would wake in about 5 minutes. Knowing that she was drunk last night, Finn knew that Rachel would have a terrible hangover, so he went to the medicine cabinet and grabbed two Advil pills and glass of orange juice, which she loved to drink with her cereal.

Hearing footsteps down the stairs, Finn took a deep breath and got ready to be greeted by Rachel.

"Hey." He smiled at her half asleep, half awake morning face that he loved.

"Hi." She replied with an emotionless face. Rubbing her forehead, Finn could tell she was in pain.

"Here, take these. I'll call the school, you look pale." He said handing her the pills.

Taking the pills from his hand, she took them and gulped down her orange juice. Turning around, she went back upstairs and went into her bed.

Taking his phone out from his pocket, he dialed the principal's number.

"Hello?" He answered.

"Hey Mr. Scheuster, it's Finn. Rachel's sick today. I was calling to ask if I could take a sick day to stay with her." He explained.

"Yeah, of coarse, Finn. I hope she gets better." He said into the phone.

"Okay, thanks a lot." He replied before hanging up.

Walking up the stairs with a tray of her breakfast, Finn slowly walked over to Rachel in bed.

"Here you go. All of your favorite. Enjoy!" He said slowly placing it on her lap.

"What's all of this?" She asked looking at him.

"Your breakfast.. Eat up!" He said placing her cup of coffee on her nightstand.

"Okay.." She whispered.

"I'll be downstairs, if you need anything just let me know.." He said turning around to walk out of the door.

"Finn.." She called.

"Yeah?" He turned around to look at her.

"You know you don't have to stay home with me? I don't wanna keep you from your job." she explained.

"You're not and besides, I want to stay with you." He assured her.

"Okay." She said.

Once Finn left the room, Rachel quickly got up from the bed and made her way over to the bathroom. Something just didn't feel right deep down inside of her. She felt even more empty inside than she did the day before.

Feeling her hands start to tremble, she wasn't aware that she going into a full blown panic attack. Sitting down on the floor, Rachel held her body close and started crying.

To her, it felt like everyday that passed on, she only felt more pain. She tried to occupy her mind with other things, but nothing worked. She had this huge weight against her heart, and the thing that made it heavier each day was getting up and knowing that Shelby wasn't coming back.

Getting up from the floor with tears in her eyes, Rachel walked over to the mirror. When she saw her reflection in the mirror, she became so disgusted with her appearance.

"Why are you lying to yourself, Rachel? You're going to be this miserable for the rest of your life. Everything's not fine!" she yelled before she sobbed and threw her fist into her reflection in the mirror. Causing the glass to shatter. "That's better." she said looking at the now mirrorless wall. Her hand was severely cut, and small pieces of glass were all around the room.

"Rachel?" Finn heard the noise from downstairs, so he came to see what it was.

Hearing his voice, Rachel's eyes widened. She quickly sat down on the toilet to make everything normal, but she forgot she had just punched the mirror.

"Oh my gosh, Rachel?" he asked walking into the bathroom. "What the hell happened? Are you okay?" he asked, looking at her straight face.

Looking at him, she finally brought a little life into her expression to explain what happened.

"I'm fine. I was umm, brushing my teeth and then the mirror just fell right in front of me." she lied.

Looking down at her hand, Finn now knew the truth.

"You're lying to me." He said taking her hurt hand in his.

"Finn.." She started trying to pull her hand away, but it hurt too much.

"Come see. Let's get that cleaned up." he said gently placing her hand on the counter.

Going into the closet, Finn pulled out the first aid kit and walked back over to Rachel.

Tending to Rachel's hand, Finn looked up to see tears falling from Rachel's face. She noticed that he was looking at her, so she quickly wiped them away, and looked down at her feet.

"Rachel, I know you're having a hard time right now. Just please, talk to me." he said.

"What do you want me to say, Finn?" She asked looking up at him.

"Anything." he replied.

"There isn't anything that I can say.." she answered.

"Come on, Rach. There has to be something that's on your mind right now." he said placing a bandage over her now cleaned cut.

"I don't know what you want from me, Finn. What? Do you want me to say that i'm mad? Because, Finn i'm mad. This is all just not fair! I shouldn't be feeling this way, Finn. She should be here with us. And now she's not and I can't..." She started sobbing and couldn't continue speaking.

"Hey.." Finn said hugging Rachel. "I know..."

"No. You see that's the problem." She began as she pulled out of Finn's embrace. "You don't know. You're never going to understand. Your mom is alive and well." She finished before she started to walk away.

"Rachel, don't do this. I love you." He called out to her.

"I'm sorry, I just have better things to do than deal with this.." She said walking downstairs and out the door, before he could stop her.

Getting to her destination, she sat down on the small bench that was surrounded by large flowers.

Looking out to the pond, Rachel's heart broke remembering when they threw her in her mother's ashes in the exact same pond. This spot was the exact same spot where her mother's funeral was held. Rachel didn't want to remember it, but she had no choice.

Getting off of the bench, Rachel picked a flower from the garden and placed it in the pond. Returning to the bench, she felt like speaking.

"Here I am, mom. Again. I guess I just can't go through a day without talking to you. So, it's been a month since you left me and I feel like it's been years. I guess, I just know that if I let go, everything will be gone. The memories, the laughter. I'm scared I'll forget it all. You. I hate all of this. I don't want to be stuck on this cruel planet! I wanna be happy again, momma. I want to see your face again." After finishing her talk, Rachel got up to face Haley.

"Hey." Haley smiled.

"What are you doing here?" Rachel asked looking at her sister.

"Well for starters, you look a mess. And second, Finn called me. He said you needed someone to talk to." she explained.

Rachel rolled her eyes, "Well, he doesn't know what he's talking about. I'm just fine on my own." she harshly replied.

"Rachel you know you can talk to me right? You aren't the only person who's ever felt this way." Haley said sitting down next to her.

"Is that supposed to make me feel better? Because it doesn't." she asked.

"I know how you feel." Haley added.

"What do you mean?" she asked, looking Haley in the eyes.

"I know how it feels. The tight weight on your heart, the thinking that everything is cruel and terrible, the endless crying, crazy actions. I've been there. I felt the exact same way when daddy died. You're lucky, Rach. You have a whole support team. You have me, Amy, and Finn, and you know that Jamie will not let his favorite aunt face this alone. When I went through all of it, I didn't have any one to talk me through it like you do right now. In order to get better, you can't push them away. You need us, and we need you, Rach. I can only promise you one thing Rachel. It will all get better. I know it will. Because when I went through it, I though I was done. But then, when I was at my lowest, you know what happened?"

"What?" Rachel asked wiping away her tears.

"I ran into a tall Basketball star named Nathan Scott." She smiled. "And now, here I am, living my dreams with the love of my life and our beautiful baby boy."

"I don't see how that has any affect on me, though. Congratulations, you got your happy ever after. But what's in it for me? Where's mine?" she asked looking at Haley with sad eyes.

"I don't know. But, let me tell you something Rachel, don't give up because your happiness is always right down the road." Falling silent for a while, Haley and Rachel sat at the bench and stared out to the pond.

"You know, there isn't a day that goes by when I don't miss her. But, in a way i'm happy for her. She found peace out of all that suffering." Haley said breaking the silence.

"I can't do this, i'm sorry." Rachel said standing up.

"Rachel, where are you going?" Haley got up and asked her.

"I can't sit here all day and listen to this! Haley, why aren't you sad? She left us! Can't you see that? I have no one! She was the only person that really understood me, and now I am all alone and I don't wanna be!" Rachel yelled at Haley.

"Rachel, if you keep doing this, you're only going to fall deeper into depression. You're not alone. You're feeling alone, because you keep making yourself distant to others! You're pushing us away! I'm only here to help. But, if you keep traveling down this path, you're never going to recover. It's your decision. Do you want to be this person forever? Or do you want to do something about it?" Haley yelled back.

"You know what? I don't need this!" Rachel yelled back, heading for her car.

"Rachel, please don't go." Haley pleaded standing outside of Rachel's car, that was now started, as Rachel was looking at her with the window rolled down.

"I don't need this and I don't want it." Rachel replied before she pulled her window up and drove away.

With tears streaming down her eyes as she drove, She couldn't help but scream to herself in the car. She screamed and cried and sobbed until she was almost out of breath. She couldn't believe that Haley had told her all of those things to her. She also couldn't believe herself for thinking that Haley was maybe right. Pulling her car over on the highway, Rachel turned off her car and started to do something she hadn't done in years, but she had to. It might be the only thing that would make her feel better right now. Closing her eyes, she took a deep breath and opened her mouth.

_I dreamed a dream in time gone by_

_When hope was high and life worth _

_living_

_I dreamed that love would never die_

_I dreamed that God would be forgiving_

_Then, I was young and unafraid _

_and dreams were made and used and wasted_

_there was no ransom to be paid_

_no song unsung, no wine untasted._

_But the tigers come at night_

_with their voices soft as thunder_

_as they tear your hope apart_

_as they turn your dream to shame_

_And still I dream she'll come to me_

_that we will live the years together_

_but there are dreams that cannot be_

_and there are storms we cannot wither._

_I had a dream my life would be_

_so different from this hell i'm living_

_So different now from what it seemed_

_now life has killed the dream_

_I dreamed_

Holding her hand to her heart, she smiled at how great it felt to sing again for the first time in years.

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	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter 9**

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3 weeks later

Slowly stirring her coffee in the mug, Rachel stared ahead blankly. It had been three weeks since she went to visit her mother's memorial grounds, and for some strange reason, her pain and anger had only grown more. Rachel distanced herself even more from her family and friends, and most importantly, Finn. It's not like she had anything to complain about though.. She liked the peace and quiet in her mind. Even though things were quite noisy around her most of the time. Finn yelling at her for different things, Haley and Amy coming to visit with their noisy children, and the annoying dinners that Finn insists on bringing her to with Burt and Carol, and most of the time Kurt too. But it was okay for Rachel, she had learned to block out all of the loud noise. The only thing she had to do when someone talked to her was smile and nod. It always worked for her.

Other than that, Rachel tried to avoid contact with anyone. When she wasn't forced to make conversation with other people, she usually just went outside and talked to the only person she actually wanted to talk to.

Rachel knew that people were starting to think that she was being ridiculous about still being upset about a death that happened a few months ago, but she really didn't care. People could think whatever the hell they wanted as far as Rachel was concerned. She didn't wake up everyday to please anyone. The only opinion that mattered to her was her mother's.

Finishing the rest of her coffee, Rachel placed her cup in the dishwasher and grabbed her keys from the hook. Closing the door behind her, Rachel was about to get in her car and pull out before she noticed something behind her car. Getting out and walking around, Rachel noticed that there was a small kitten laying behind her car.

"Hey, buddy." She smiled, petting it's fur. "Someone's lost, aren't they?" She asked picking up the small kitten and cradling in her arms like a baby.

"How about we get you inside?" She asked walking towards the door to her house and unlocking it. Getting in she placed the kitten on the floor and poured some milk into a bowl to place on the floor with it.

"There you go, buddy." she said looking down at him.

Getting into her car, she smiled at the fact that she had just helped a cute kitten. Pulling out of the driveway, Rachel made her way to work.

The rest of the day went by at a pretty much slow pace, besides the quick lunch break and planning period. Other than that, she felt like she was at school forever. When she finally left to go home, she was exhausted and just wanted to lay down in her bed and sleep the rest of the night. Walking into the house, Rachel noticed that Finn was already home, watching the TV with Jamie on the side of him. They were watching a basketball game, go figure.

Since Jamie was here, Rachel knew that she had to try to be at her best. She didn't want him to see anything different and go tell his mom all about it so that she could come lecture her all over again.

Hearing her heels make noise on the floor, Jamie turned around and saw Rachel slowly walking into the living room. Getting up from the couch, he got Finn's attention, who turned around and saw Rachel too.

"Hey, Rachie." He ran to her and smiled.

Looking up at Finn, she noticed he was giving her a cautionary eye, telling her to be nice to the 4 year old. She nodded and looked down at the small child.

"Hey, little man." she smiled, getting down and giving him a tight bear hug. "Gosh, you've gotten so big since the last time I saw you. What are now like.. 20?" she asked gaining a laugh from Jamie.

"No, i'm this many." he said holding up 4 fingers.

"You're 4? No way!" She replied smiling as he shook his head to prove that he was.

"So, what brings you to the house, Jimmy Jam?" she asked getting up and placing her purse on the coffee table in the living room.

"Mommy and Daddy had to go to somewhere." he replied in the cutest voice ever.

"Oh, fun. How about you go get yourself cleaned up for dinner, while Rachie makes it, okay?" she asked the small boy. Without a reply he smiled big and turned to hop up the stairs.

Walking into the kitchen with Finn behind her, she turned to speak to him.

"Why's Jamie here?"

"Nathan's mom is in the hospital and they didn't want Jamie to know. Haley asked if we could watch him for the night, and I figured you wouldn't mind. Plus, It'll be fun, and maybe even a good distraction from all of the bad stuff." He said rubbing her arm.

"I don't know, Finn.." she started.

"If you decide you can't handle it, you can have a free ticket to leave at anytime." He replied.

"Okay." she finally gave in.

"Just promise me that you'll be different with him than you have been lately. He's too young to understand and it'll crush him." Finn began.

"Okay." she answered back.

"Rach, i'm being serious." Finn said looking into her eyes.

"I know you are. I promise, okay?" she answered him again.

"Okay."

Before any of them could say anything else, Jamie came running down from the stairs with a huge basketball jersey that fell to the floor, with the number 23 on it and the word Scott printed on the back.

"Hey, dude. Nice jersey, man! High five!" Finn said kneeling to be the same height as him.

"Thanks, it was for daddy but he didn't need it anymore. He gave it to me." He smiled and jumped around in it. "Do you like it, Rachie?" he asked looking up at her with big blue eyes.

"You look awesome, little dude." She smiled while peeling cheese into a bowl.

"Wanna go shoot some hoops before dinner?" Finn asked him, looking down at the small child.

"Let's go!" He shouted, pointing his small hands towards the door.

Walking towards the back of the house, Finn noticed that Jamie was tripping over the oversized jersey. Turning around he picked up Jamie, and carried him to the court to make things easier for him. Plus, he enjoyed carrying the little guy. He was so short and he didn't way that much.

When they got to the court Finn placed Jamie on the ground and got the basketball from the bench. "Okay, buddy, what do you want to play?" he asked him holding the ball in his hands.

"It doesn't matter. I'll still beat you!" he said, giggling at the shocked look on Finn's face.

"Is that so?" Finn asked the laughing child.

"Yes." he said crossing his arms over his chest with a serious face.

"Well then, I guess we'll see about that." he smiled, walking next to Jamie. "Let's play horse."

"Okay." he smiled up at Finn.

Once the game was over, they both decided to take a break to sit and rest for a while. Silently sipping on their water bottles, Jamie broke the silence.

"Why is Rachie acting differently?" Jamie asked looking up at his uncle.

"Well, buddy, Rachel's just been through a rough time these past few months." Finn tried to explain the best he could to a 4 year old.

"Is it because of grandma?" he asked.

"Yes, buddy. Since grandma went away, Rachel's been really sad about it." Finn answered.

"Is she going to be okay?" he asked another question.

"If there is anything I know for certain, it's that Rachel will most definitely get better. We just have to believe in her, okay?" he said.

"Okay." He replied.

"Buddy, it's getting pretty late, let's head back home." Finn told him.

"Wait.." Jamie said getting up and walking over to an object on the ground.

"It's a penny. It was on heads, which means good luck. Let's give it to Rachie, so she can get better." he smiled holding the penny in his hand.

"I think she's really love it." he said smiling at him as he walked over to the grass. "wait, where are you going now?"

Bending down, Jamie picked two small purple wild flowers out of the ground. "I think she's gonna like these too!" Jamie replied. "Come on, Don't wanna be late!" Jamie shouted, running ahead of Finn.

When they got into the kitchen, Jamie and Finn could smell the food on the stove. Before they could see what it was, Rachel walked into the kitchen.

"Hey!" Jamie smiled up at her.

"Hey buddy." she lightly smiled back.

"Jamie, show her what you got." Finn said.

"Here you go, Rachie." He smiled brightly handing her the two objects.

"What's this?" She asked smiling at him.

"I got you flowers because their you favorite color, and a penny for good luck, so you can stop being sad." he explained with a smile on his face.

Kneeling down, tears started to pour out of her eyes, and she motioned for him to walk to her. "Come see, baby."

Walking over to her, Rachel pulled Jamie into a tight and loving embrace. Silently crying into his shoulder, she wiped her tears away and began to speak.

"Thanks, buddy. This means a lot to me." She smiled at him.

"You're welcome." he smiled and walked over to the counter. "What's for supper?"

"Well, I thought I would make your favorite tonight. So, how about some macaroni and cheese, with chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs?" she asked looking at his lit up face.

"The food of the gods!" he yelled.

"Yes, the food of the gods." Finn said sitting next to him at the counter.

"You guys eat up while I go do something real quick" she said.

Walking up the stairs, she went into her room, and closed the door behind her and sat in front of it. She was having, yet another, panic attack. This was the fourth one this week. She didn't know why they would happen, she just had so much stress and anxiety in her. Holding her arms and rocking herself back and forth, Rachel started to feel the tears in her eyes.

"Okay, Rachel, keep calm. Jamie's downstairs. He can't see you like this. He can't know that this is bad. He can't know about this. He's so young. It would crush him. You can handle one night. You can handle just one night of pretending. For heaven's sake, you wanted to be on Broadway. You can play nice. It's just for one night. You can do this." She whispered to herself as she rocked back and forth.

Getting up from the floor, Rachel walked over to the closet in the bathroom, and pulled out a bottle of an over the counter bottle of Benadryl. Opening up the bottle, she poured two capsule into her hand and placed the bottle exactly where it was. Placing them in her mouth, she swallowed and drank water from the bathroom sink. If the information on the bottle was right, Rachel would be sleepy in no time. This usually always calmed her down.

Going back downstairs, Rachel walked in on Finn and Jamie playing a fighting scene with their two dinosaur shaped chicken nuggets.

"You're not gonna win this time!" Finn shouted making swishing sounds as the chicken nuggets moved around with his hand.

"Neither will you!" Jamie exclaimed, grabbing Finn's chicken nugget and biting it's head off.

"Hey! That was my best one!" Finn protested.

"Sucks to be you!" Jamie replied.

"You little fart!" Finn exclaimed as he picked up Jamie from his chair and started tickling him.

"Ah, put me down!" he yelled with lots of laughter.

Quickly walking past the two, Rachel went back upstairs and straight to bed. The next time she woke up, it was at around 11:00 and Finn was getting into bed.

"He's finally asleep." Finn whispered with a chuckle.

"Did you have any trouble putting him to sleep?" Rachel asked him.

"Not really, he was out like a light bulb." he replied. "He's the cutest thing ever." Finn added.

"Yeah." she replied. "Well, you better get your energy for tomorrow. You know Haley's gonna be here as early as she can be."

"I know. Goodnight, baby." He said.

"Goodnight." she replied.

Getting up the next day, Rachel quickly threw on her clothes for work. She had woken up at 5:35 which was late for her. When she was finally ready, she ran down into the kitchen where a bowl of cereal was waiting for her. Looking at her watch, she had only about 10 minutes before she had to be out the door and on her way to school. Gulping the cereal down with her spoon, she was accompanied by Finn and Jamie, who was fully dressed with Jeans, the Star Wars shirt that she always argued against, and his tiny light up shoes. Even though Rachel hated her life right now, she had to admit that Jamie Scott was the cutest child that she had ever seen in her whole entire lifetime. Placing her empty bowl in the sink, she straightened out her skirt, took a deep breath, and started her acting for the day.

"Hey buddy!" she smiled, maybe a little too much. Finn looked at her suspiciously.

"Hey, Rachie. Guess what? I get to spend the whole day with Aunt Brooke at big kid school!" Jamie exclaimed.

"I know! Isn't that amazing! How about we get in the car so we can get to school on time?" she asked grabbing her purse and opening the door for him to get outside.

"I'll be at school around 8. I have to go to a meeting." Finn called after her.

"Okay." she said before closing the door behind her.

Getting to the car, Rachel opened the back door and picked up Jamie to place him in his car seat. Making sure that he was securely strapped in, she closed the back door, and walked to the driver's side. Starting the car, she pulled out of the driveway and started to head towards the school. About halfway to the school Jamie asked Rachel to turn on the radio. She told him that maybe the could listen to it later, because she needed to concentrate on the road.

"Can we please? You could put it very low." Jamie begged.

"I'm sorry, babe. I have to concentrate on the road. It's really rainy outside this morning." she calmly explained.

"But momma lets me listen to the radio when it's raining." Jamie replied back.

"That's because you're momma's a more experienced driver than I am." Rachel answered him back.

"Please! I want to listen to the radio... Please, Rachie!" He started to raise his voice.

"I'm sorry, buddy. The answer's no. I don't want us to get hurt in this bad weather. Didn't your momma pack your iPod in that bag. Listen to that." she said looking at him through the rear view mirror.

"No! I wanna listen to the radio!" he shouted as he started crying. He was being very loud.

"Jamie, please stop crying baby. I'm sorry." she tried to calm him down so he could be quiet.

"No! I want the radio!" he screamed even louder, which caused the crying to get louder.

"Jamie, shut the hell up!" she screamed, causing him to stop crying and look at her in disbelief. Look's like her acting flew straight out the window. "Jamie... I'm sorry, buddy.. I didn't mean to.."

"I want my aunt Brooke." he started crying again, this time in a lower tone because he was scared that she would yell at him again.

When they got to the school. Rachel felt that Jamie was trying to walk as far away from her as possible. Which she couldn't blame him, since she had practically screamed her lungs out at him earlier in the car. Great. She thought. "You're a sad mess and a screw up at the same exact time."

When they got to Brooke Davis Baker's classroom, Jamie ran up to her and hugged her tight.

"Hey Jamie!" she exclaimed with her scratchy voice.

"Aunt Brooke, I missed you. I never wanna see her again!" he exclaimed pointing to Rachel, who just stood in the doorway with a straight face.

"What? Why, buddy?" She asked looking at Rachel.

"She yelled at me in the car. She told me to shut up." he explained to Brooke.

"Buddy, can Rachel and I have a minute alone?" How about you go get something to eat from the vending machine outside my classroom?" she said, holding out a dollar bill.

"Okay." he said grabbing it, and then exiting the room.

"Close the door and have a seat, please." Brooke instructed Rachel.

"Look, I didn't mean to yell at him, Brooke. You would have done the exact same thing. It was pouring and he was screaming. It was the only thing I could do." Rachel tried to explain.

"Rachel, he is 4 years old! Gosh Rachel, how could you be so stupid? Now, i'm going to have to tell his mother that his grown up aunt told him to shut up!" Brooke yelled.

"Okay." she said getting up from the desk and running out of the classroom. Getting into the bathroom, she quickly checked if anyone else was in it, she found that no one else was, so she locked the doors and went back to the mirror.

"You just have to screw up everything, don't you Rachel. Gosh, you're such a disappointment. I can't even look at you. Neither can my whole family!" she broke down in front of the mirror.

Looking through her purse, she silently cursed when she remembered that she didn't put the bottle of Benadryl in her purse. Now, she was stuck, crying on the bathroom floor, with 5 minutes till the tardy bell rang. Knowing that her class was walking into class at this moment, she decided that she was just going to have to suck it up.

Walking into her classroom, she was accompanied by everyone in her classroom staring at her, even Jordan and Jason.

"Sorry i'm late guys.." she said walking in and closing the door behind her. "Lucky for you guys, today's going to be an easy day. Read the chapter on pages 81-84 and then you're done for the day. Ready, set, go!" she said as she walked over to her desk and placed her purse in the floor.

Looking out her window, she noticed something that she hadn't noticed before. The highway. For the rest of the class period, she sat at her desk staring out the window, thinking of a lot of things.

When lunch came around, Rachel went to the teachers lounge and sat at the table that had the best view out of the window. To Rachel's luck, the window had the same view her classroom had. The highway. Staring outside of the window the whole entire time, she hadn't even noticed that Finn joined her.

"Hey, what you looking at?" he asked, watching her stare out of the window.

"Come see." she smiled.

"What?" he asked walking over to the window with her.

"You see that highway? It amazes me so much." she said looking at it with fascination.

"Why? It's just a regular highway." he replied not as into it as she was.

"It's just so amazing, and the cars go by so fast." she smiled brightly at the passing cars.

"Okay, well I have an urgent Glee club meeting that I have to get to , but i'm glad you found something that makes you happy. I'll see you later, sweetie. Have a nice day." Finn said grabbing his coke and walking away.

"The cars go by so fast. All you have to do is take one step and you'll be free. Painless, and fast. You wouldn't even know what happened." she whispered to herself as she stared out at the highway with the fast cars traveling on it.

When the final bell rang, signaling that school was over, Rachel waited for all of the students to leave her classroom before she walked out of the school with them. Getting off the campus, Rachel walked along the grass head lane to get to her destination, in which she had been admiring all day. When she finally got to her stop, she smiled at how nice it felt to be standing where she was standing. The wind from the cars passing by was very soothing, and this time the tears were for joy. Looking onto the road, she smiled up at the sky when she realized she was going to see her again. There was nothing holding her back any longer. It was finally her moment. She was going to be able to see her mother's beautiful face again, she was also going to be able to hear that beautiful laugh that she had been longing for.

Feeling the wind against her face, she closed her eyes, took a deep breath, and braced herself for what was about to come next.

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**Sorry for the cliffhanger guys.. Review! :)**


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter 10**

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Taking a deep breath and closing her eyes, Rachel embraced the wind that flew upon her face from the passing cars. Feeling her tears roll down her face, she knew that she was finally ready. Holding her hands to her sides, she took another deep breath and shut her eyes tight, before she made her move. Placing her foot out in front of her, she braced herself to make the leap she had been anticipating. Taking the big step into the street with her eyes closed, she held out her hands towards the oncoming traffic. When she could feel the lights and hear the loud horns, she knew that it was almost time. Smiling, she stood in the same position. But before anything happened, Rachel felt a pair of strong arms wrap around her body, pulling her to the side. Opening her eyes, she was standing on the side of the road, where she was a few minutes ago, and this time she wasn't alone.

"Rachel, what the hell were you doing?!" Finn yelled with tears pouring out of his eyes.

"You weren't supposed to save me! You weren't supposed to come! I was supposed to die!" she screamed, trying to fight against Finn, as he pulled her into a tight hug. Opening her eyes, she finally came to realization. "I'm so sorry! Oh Finn, I'm sorry! I'm so, so sorry." she sobbed pulling him into an even tighter hug.

"Shhh, everything's alright now, you don't have to apologize for anything. I'm here now." he said rubbing his hand over her hair, and kissing the top of her head.

**3 weeks later**

"What made you want to walk into that highway, Rachel?"

"I don't know. I guess I just wanted to feel something other than the pain that I had been experiencing." she replied to her therapist, Dr. Carlisle.

"How did you think it would make you feel?" she asked, looking at Rachel, who was sitting on the couch, thinking.

"I thought it would make me feel some sense of being alive. I thought it would make me feel alive." Rachel said.

"Did it?" Dr. Carlisle asked, writing in her notebook.

"No. Actually, it made me feel the exact opposite." she replied.

"One of the things about depression, Rachel, is that it's so uncertain. One day you can be at your worst, and then you can wake up another day feeling like a brand new person. I can promise you that you will feel happy again. There are other things you can do to get rid of this horrible disease too. Maybe try to spend more time around close friends and family, spend alone time with your husband every now and then. You can even take the time to appreciate the world around you. Try what works for you, and one day it'll pull you out of depression. It worked for me, I don't see how it won't work for you. And if it doesn't i'm going to give you an antidepressant to make sure that it all goes away." She told her. "Here you go." she said as she handed her a slip of paper, with a prescription on it.

"Thanks." Rachel smiled as they both stood up. "See you next week." she said before she followed the doctor out of the office.

When she pulled into her driveway, she smiled when she saw Finn outside helping Jamie with his baseball throw. Getting out of her car, she walked over to them.

"Hey mister! I got a runner at home!" she shouted, causing Finn to look at her. "Give me the ball, he's gonna get another run in!" she joked.

"No girls allowed, right Jamie?" Finn joked.

When seeing Rachel, Jamie walked behind Finn's legs. Still scared from a few weeks ago, Jamie didn't want to be around her.

"Jamie, what's wrong buddy?" Finn asked, as he felt the small child clinging onto his legs, as his life depended on it.

Frowning when she realized that he was scared of her, Rachel walked closer to Finn, kneeling down where Jamie was hiding.

"Hey, buddy. Can aunt Rachie talk to you for a minute? If you want, we can go sit by the pool." she smiled sympathetically towards the scared 4 year old.

"Will you yell again?" he asked in a low voice.

"No, baby. I promise." she assured him.

"Pinky?" he asked.

"Pinky." she replied, holding out her pinky for him to shake it.

Running in the direction of the pool, Rachel stood next to Finn as they both smiled at him.

"He's getting so big." Finn admitted.

"I know." she smiled. "But he's still cute."

"Very." Finn agreed.

"Jamie, wait up!" Rachel called, running after him.

Watching Rachel run after Jamie, Finn couldn't help but smile. He was so proud of how much better Rachel had gotten within the past few weeks. She wasn't the same person that she had been for the past few months. He was beginning to come face to face with the old Rachel. The one that he fell in love with in high school. The one that he married. She was coming back more and more everyday. He guessed that the incident a few weeks finally opened her eyes.

"How about we sit right here and dunk our feet in the pool?" Rachel asked.

"Okay." he replied as they did.

"Alright, let me try and explain this to you as best as I can. A few weeks ago, I was very sick." Rachel started.

"Like Grandma?" he asked looking up at her with his beautiful big blue eyes that he obviously inherited from Nathan.

"No. A different kind of sickness. My sickness made me very sad and angry." she explained.

"Oh." he answered.

"Baby, I didn't mean to yell at you. I was just very sad at the world and I took out all my anger on you, which I shouldn't have. I want you to know that I will never, ever yell at you like that again. You're my only baby, jimmy jam, and I love you too much. Please don't think that I hate you, because you're one of the most important people in my life. Okay? I love you, little man."

"I love you too, Rachie." he smiled up at her, and jumped on her with wet feet.

"Whoa! Oh no! I'm full of water!" she laughed. "You're gonna get it!" she told him with a serious face. Picking him up in her arms, she walked towards the pool house, and grabbed two floaties. "Here buddy, I think you're gonna need these." she smiled and put them on his arms.

"What are we doing?" he asked, confused.

"This!" she picked him up, and tossed him in the pool, jumping in right after him.

"Hey! You threw me in the pool." he yelled when he got above the water.

"What'cha gonna do about it, big shot?" she asked playfully.

"I don't know." he said before swimming towards her, splashing her. "This!"

After they were done splashing each other, Jamie and Rachel were floating around the shallow area. "Rachie, can we dance like prince and princess?" he asked swimming around with his big floaties wrapped around his arms to hold him up.

"Sure. Are you gonna be the princess this time?" she asked playfully.

"No! I'm the prince, remember?" he reminded her.

"Okay. Come see." she replied.

Getting into the proper position, they started to move around the shallow area. "Music." Jamie told her.

"Okay, buddy."

_A dream is a wish _

_you're heart makes._

_when you're fast asleep._

_In dreams you will loose your heartache_

_whatever you wish for, you keep._

_Have faith in your dreams_

_and someday_

_Your rainbow will come smiling through_

_No matter how your heart is grieving_

_if you keep on believing _

_a dream that you wish will come true_

_A dream is a wish_

_your heart makes_

_when you're feeling small_

_alone in the night you whisper_

_thinking no one can hear you at all_

_you wake with the morning sunlight_

_you'll find fortune that is smiling on you_

_don't let your heart be filled with sorrow_

_for all you know tomorrow_

_a dream that you wish will come true._

"Again, Again!" he clapped his hands together.

"Sorry to interrupt little prince, but that was momma Haley who just called. Looks like tonight's gonna be another sleepover." Finn walked over to the side of the pool.

"Yay!" he clapped his hands together again.

"I have an idea, Jimmy jam." Rachel whispered.

Swimming over to the edge of the pool, Rachel jumped up, and grabbed Finn's legs, pulling him in the pool with them.

"Oh you're going to get it, Rachel Berry!" Finn yelled and swam over to her, blocking her from getting away.

Picking her up in the pool, he tossed her into the deep end. Swimming behind Jamie, he picked him up. "you're next, little man!" Finn tossed him in Rachel's direction.

"You're done, Finn Hudson!" Rachel yelled jumping out of the pool, picking Jamie up with her, and running towards the pool house. Getting into the pool house, Rachel turned towards Jamie, and started speaking.

"Okay, Buddy. Here, we're gonna take these water guns and we're gonna knock him dead!" she exclaimed.

"We're gonna kill Finnie?" he asked with concern on his face.

"No. We're gonna spray him with these water guns. But we have to stay close together. Okay? Break on 3. Ready, 1,2,3!" she yelled as they burst out of the pool house, becoming surprised when Finn wasn't in the pool.

"Looking for me?" They both turned around to find Finn with two water guns in his hands.

"How? But these are the.." Rachel began.

"Any real man would keep two spare water guns under his bed at night. No telling when I'll get challenged.." he answered.

"Okay, Jamie. We have to stay confident! We're gonna win this!" Rachel exclaimed.

"Or, Jamie, you could come on my team and we could win against the girl. Girls have cooties remember?" Finn persuaded him.

"No they do not! Come on, Jamie. You're my homie! We got this!" Rachel tried to persuade him as well.

"Sorry Rachie, girls do have cooties." Jamie said as he walked over to Finn's side.

"Yes!" Finn exclaimed, high-fiving Jamie.

"James Lucas Scott!" Rachel exclaimed.

"It's not personal, just business. You're going down!" He exclaimed as they charged toward her.

"Not if I have anything to say about it!" she screamed as she began spraying them with her water gun.

By the time they were all finished with their water balloon fight, it was 6:15 and they were all tired and hungry. Picking up all of the toys and guns, Rachel walked into the house where Finn and Jamie were drying off with beach towels.

"Okay, little man. Ready for bath time?" she asked, placing her hands on her hips.

"I don't need to take a bath, I went swimming." he replied.

"Is that so?" she asked.

"Yes." he answered.

"Okay, but don't come crying to me when the chlorine from the pool is eating away at your skin In the middle of the night." she sarcastically said, slowly walking away.

"How about that bath, then?" he called after her.

"Start heading towards the bathroom, you little nerd!" she laughed as he ran to the bathroom.

"He has some PJ's he left behind a few weeks ago, if you were wondering what he should wear tonight." Finn came into the living room, drinking a bottle of water.

"Okay, thanks." she smiled.

"Gosh, I missed that smile." he said putting his water down, walking over to her, as he pulled her into a warm embrace.

"It feels good to smile. I feel like all that old pain, it's fading away. Today really helped it fade quickly." she smiled.

"I love you, you know that?" he asked.

"I love you too. More than you will ever know." she replied.

"That's not possible."

"Whatever you say. Let me get back to Jamie. No telling what mess he's made in that bathroom already." she laughed.

"Okay, I'll go get the food. I ordered take out from that new Chinese place down the street if that's okay with you."

"That's fine. See you later, babe." she smiled, blowing him a kiss.

By the time Jamie was all cleaned up and dressed in his pajamas, Rachel picked him up and placed him on the couch in the living room. Picking up the remote, she put it on the Disney Channel.

"The Disney channel is for babies!" Jamie yelled.

"But you are a baby, James Lucas Scott. You're my baby!" she smiled, cuddling close to him.

"Can we watch basketball?" he asked.

"Okay, whatever you want." she smiled.

"Thank you, Rachie." he hugged her.

"You know, you can be really sweet when you wanna be." she said hugging him back.

"I know." he smiled.

laughing, they both turned to see the door opening up, with Finn behind it.

"Food!" Jamie jumped up and ran over to Finn.

"That's right buddy! Guess what? I got your favorite. Noodles." Finn exclaimed placing the bag on the counter.

"What about me?" Rachel asked.

"Teriyaki chicken, more noodles, shrimp fried rice, and lots of soy sauce." Finn told her.

"You're the best!" she laughed.

"Okay, let's eat up!" Finn exclaimed.

By the time they had all finished their plates, and took the rest of their showers and baths, they were all tired and stuffed. By 10:00, they were all laying on the couch. Rachel had her head rested against Finn's shoulder, as she held Jamie in her arms. They were all watching Finding Nemo, which, Rachel had to admit that it was one of her favorite Disney movies. By the time the movie was over, Jamie was passed out in Rachel's arms, and Rachel was drifting off into Finn's side.

"Do you need me to take him to bed?" Finn asked.

"No, I got it." she slowly got up, as Jamie wrapped his arms around her neck, and placed his head against his shoulder. When Rachel got into the spare bedroom, she placed him in the big bed, and tucked him In tight. Walking out of the room, Rachel turned on the night light and left a small crack in the door.

Getting to her own room, Finn was in the bathroom, brushing his teeth before bed. Joining him, they started talking.

"Today was fun, huh?" he smiled.

"Yeah." she smiled, with her toothbrush in her mouth.

"It got me thinking.. Rach, I really want to have one of our own. What do you think?" Finn asked.

"I don't know. Are we ready?" she asked.

"Are you ready, because I know that I am." he said placing his toothbrush in it's holder, and walking over to their bed, with Rachel following.

"I don't know. I'll have to think about it." she said getting in on the opposite side of the bed. "Goodnight, baby." she smiled and kissed Finn.

"Goodnight, love." he replied, before they turned out the lights and went to sleep.

At around 2, Rachel was abruptly woken up by a loud crying coming from down the hall. When Finn turned on the lights, she knew that she wasn't the only one who heard it. Looking at each other, they both got up and ran to his room. When they turned on the lights, the found Jamie holding his legs and sitting up in his bed. His face was red and his tears were flowing down his face, as he continued to cry.

"What's wrong, jimmy jam?" Rachel asked walking towards the bed.

"My body hurts." he explained through his sobs.

Wiping away his tears, Rachel felt his forehead, which felt like it was burning.

"Finn, go get the thermometer downstairs, I think he has a fever." she instructed.

When Finn finally got upstairs with the thermometer, Rachel took Jamie's temperature. It was 102.

"Finn it's 102. What do we do? Do we call Haley? Bring him to the hospital? Are they even open right now? What are we going to do?" Rachel asked frantically.

"Rachel, calm down. He said his body hurt, he probably just caught the flu. I'm going to go get him some Tylenol from the cabinet. Then we'll let him rest it off. If the fever gets any higher, then we'll take him to the hospital and call Haley, okay?" He asked.

"Okay." she replied. "Okay, little man, do you wanna come join me in Uncle Finn and Rachie's bed for a little while? We can watch ESPN if you want." she asked, and he shook his head with more tears flowing from his eyes. "I don't feel good, Rachie." he said.

"It's okay, Baby. Finnie's gonna go get you some medicine to make you feel all better." she assured him.

"Okay." he answered, allowing Rachel to pick him up and bring him to her room. When they got to her room, she placed his small frame in the middle of their king sized bed.

Getting on the side of him, she turned on her TV, and put on his favorite channel. When he started crying again, Rachel knew that even ESPN wasn't going to take his pain away. "Come here, sweetie." she said as she picked him up and rocked him back and forth like a baby.

"How about I sing you a lullaby?" she asked.

"What is it?" he asked.

"Wait, here's Finnie. He has your medicine." Rachel replied, seeing Finn walk into the room, with 2 table spoons of Tylenol.

When Jamie took the medicine, he rested his head against Rachel's chest, and asked what lullaby she was going to sing to him. Finn, got on the other side of the bed, and watched them.

"Well, this is an old song that my mother used to sing to me when I was ready for bedtime. I really think you're gonna like it." she smiled, as she began rocking him back and forth again.

_Raindrops on roses_

_and whiskers on kittens_

_bright copper kettles_

_and warm woolen mittens_

_brown paper packages _

_tied up with strings_

_these are a few of my favorite things_

_Cream colored ponies_

_and crisp apple strudels_

_doorbells and sleigh bells and _

_schnitzel with noodles _

_wild geese that fly with the moon on their wings _

_these are a few of my favorite things_

_girls in white dresses_

_with blue satin sashes_

_snowflakes that stay on my nose and eyelashes_

_silver white winters that melt into springs_

_these are a few of my favorite things_

_when the dog bites_

_when the bee stings_

_when i'm feeling sad_

_I simply remember my favorite things and then I don't feel_

_so bad._

When the song ended, Jamie was sleeping on her, and Finn was watching her as she gently placed him in the middle of the two.

"Is it okay if he sleeps in here tonight?" she asked Finn.

"Absolutely." he smiled.

"Hold on. I think I have something that might make him feel better." she said slowly getting out of bed and walking around, to their closet. Getting on her tippy toes, she grabbed the box at the top of the shelf.

Placing the box on the bed, she sat on Finn's side of the bed and opened the box, grabbing out an old item from her past. "Mr. Cuddles. He worked wonders for me when I was sick, and I know that Jamie will love him." she smiled, as she picked up the teddy bear from the box. "He's not in his best condition, but that doesn't mean that Jamie won't love him any less." she smiled looking down at the object in her hands. Rachel reached over towards Jamie, lifted his arm, and placed Mr. Cuddles under it. "There." she said getting up, accidentally knocking down the whole box.

"Let me help you with that." Finn said getting up.

Picking up all of the items, Rachel held in her hands her old pacifier. Looking at it, she looked at Finn and spoke.

"I'm ready."

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**Review!**


	11. Chapter 11

**Chapter 11**

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The next day, Rachel tossed over in her bed to find Jamie holding onto Finn as they both slept peacefully. Turning over to face her nightstand, she checked her clock. It was now 7:30 am. On a regular Sunday morning Rachel would've been up by now, but she honestly didn't care about time anymore. The only thing that mattered to right now was that she had a great night with her family. She hoped these moments would continue for her.

Silently slipping out of the bed, Rachel walked downstairs to fix breakfast for everyone and to do her normal Sunday morning routines. Since it was a little rainy outside, she decided that she wouldn't go running today. Which left her with her morning chores and breakfast making. Putting the coffee pot on, she turned on the news, went into the utility room, and brought the basket of clean clothes into the kitchen to fold while she was watching TV. When she was finished, she picked up all of the clothes in their correct placements and placed the dirty clothes in the washer, and the wet clothes in the dryer.

By the time she was finished with doing the clothes, she placed the dirty dishes in the dishwasher, and walked over to the living room to clean up the mess that Jamie had made the previous night, with his toy trucks and airplanes. Placing them in the bin that Rachel had placed in her living room for Jamie's toys, she couldn't help but smile at how cute she found it. She couldn't wait to have one of her own. If her child was anything like Jamie, she knew that she would love it to death. She also knew that Finn would be amazing father. She sometimes watched how he was with Jamie, and she would laugh at how great he was with him.

Deep down, Rachel always knew that Finn would give her a good life, ever since the first time she had the pleasure to actually speak to him. Rachel remembered exactly how she felt about him in high school. She had always had a crush on him since middle school. The first time that Rachel actually started falling for him was when she used to swing by herself on the swing set outside in middle school. She would always find her favorite swing and she would go as high as she could, singing her favorite songs from the Broadway musical, Funny Girl.

In middle school, Rachel never really tended to have many friends, since she had a demanding attitude, and sometimes that was okay for her. Some of the people in her middle school made her glad to be alone, while others made her feel like she would be a loner for the rest of her life. Example? Santana Lopez, and her two evil minions, as Rachel called them, Brittany Pierce, and Quinn Fabray. It also never really helped that Rachel wasn't really the looker in middle school.

Because of her family's long line of bad genes, Rachel and Amy had both picked up the gene of being near sighted, which meant that Rachel spent most of her time in middle school with huge, black Ray Ban glasses that made her look like a big nerd. Her mother always told her that Ray Bans were like really hip back in the day, but Rachel always felt the exact opposite of cool wearing them. What made it worse was that Santana had spread a pretty nasty rumor about her in the sixth grade, saying that her new nickname should be bug eyes. It took till her freshman year of high school for people to stop calling her that. Even Amy called her that at time to time when she was mad at her.

Since Amy was only two years older than Rachel, you would think that she would be close to her little sister and stand up for her to Santana. But that was the exact opposite for them two. Amy had a very good reputation with her class mates, and she saw Rachel as a nuisance to her. She always tried to avoid Rachel at school. Because God forbid she was seen with her.

When Amy was the eight grade, Shelby finally let her get contacts, which was mainly the source of her popularity. Another source of that was when she started dating Todd Anderson, which was the most popular guy in the eighth grade. Everyone looked up to Amy, as she was sometimes known as the queen of the middle school. Even Santana looked up to her. Rachel often felt sad that her sister was so pretty and popular when she was stuck being the little girl on the swings that no one dared to go near because she was such a nerd.

Rachel would always keep to herself in middle school. In class while everyone would talk while the teacher was teaching. On the other hand, Rachel would spend time in class actually listening to the teacher and preparing for the test. Come time for the test, everyone in class would ask her for the answers, because they knew she was the only one who paid attention. The main reason no one really liked her was because she never gave them the answers and when someone would try and copy off of her paper, she would bubble in the wrong answers, watch them turn in their paper, erase all of her wrong answers, and start new, bubbling in the correct ones.

But, enough on that. Back to the story of how she felt about Finn Hudson. One day she was swinging in her normal spot, this time drawing a picture of the flower bushes that were growing by the trees, when she felt something really hard hit the top of her head. Stopping her swing she stood up, and rubbed the top of her head. Looking at the ground, she realized that it was a football that hit her. Picking it up, she looked up and came face to face with him.

"Are you okay? I'm so sorry. It was an accident." He said looking at her.

"it's fine. Just, next time, aim for the field goal." she replied, throwing him the ball, before he headed back to his friends playing football with him.

To this day, Rachel doubted that Finn knew that was her, since she was wearing her big glasses.

Ever since that moment, Rachel would spend most of her time at recess going to that swing and watching him play football with his friends. The only thing that bothered her was that he never looked at her the way she wanted him to. She would spend all of her time in class looking at him, and when he looked back at her, she would pretend to be paying attention to the teacher.

Since Finn Hudson was the most popular guy in the class when they got into the eight grade, Rachel thought she would turn out like Amy, dating him. So when Shelby finally agreed to letting Rachel get contacts, she went into class the next day, smiling wide, hoping that he would see her as a different person. She did get some curious looks from the class that day, but to her surprise, he didn't even look at her. It hurt her so bad, that she cried as hard as she could in her room that night. Eight grade didn't work to Rachel's advantage at all. She didn't become popular and she didn't get the boy, and she didn't get her happily ever after. In fact, she got the exact opposite. She got hell. In eight grade, the only girl who's reputation flew up was Quinn Fabray's. When they were in the sixth grade, Quinn would always stand quietly behind Santana as she spoke, but when they got to eighth grade, Quinn started speaking for herself, and her mother finally introduced her to makeup which made all of the guys in the class flip. She caught all of the attention from all of the boys, especially Finn. By the time eight grade graduation rolled around, Rachel's heart sank as the new buzz of the school was that Finn and Quinn had became an item.

When she heard the news from one of the middle school cheerleaders, she knew that her fight was over. He was taken and all she could do was sit on the sidelines while she watched him look at Quinn the way she wanted him to look at her. All she wanted to do was get out of there and focus on her career as an actress in high school.

Once she did become a freshman at high school, things had changed a lot for her. Since the high school was a lot bigger than their middle school, she barely ever saw Finn anymore. The only time she would see him was when they would pass by each other in the hallways. During the middle of her freshman year, she was finally over Finn, when she caught the eye of another boy. One Jesse St. James. He asked her out one day at school, and from that point, she was glad to call him her boyfriend. But at the end of the freshman year, Rachel was left in tears after she found out that he had been cheating on her since day one. Rachel was pretty sure the whole school saw their breakup, even Finn.

He was standing at his locker one day, while Rachel just had some blonde girl walk up to her and tell her that she had a one night stand with Jessie a few weeks ago. When she approached him at his locker he smiled and started talking.

"Hey, baby. You're ready for that movie we're going to see tonight? I'm excited." He said looking down at her sad face. "What's wrong? You look like you just saw a ghost."

"Yeah, the ghost of our relationship." she mumbled under breath.

"What?" he asked.

"You know what? Why don't you take Erica to the movies with you tonight, since you two were so close a few weeks ago!" she yelled, calling attention to other people in the hallway.

"Rachel, keep your voice down. You're gonna cause a scene." he tried to calm her down.

"Don't tell me what to do, Jessie! The only thing that i'm gonna do is kick your ass if you don't tell me the truth!" she screamed at him, now getting a crowd of people surrounding them, the whole school.

"Rach, it was only one time. I swear it won't happen again." he admitted.

"You're right. It won't happen again. Because we're no longer together! We're done." she yelled.

"Rach, please don't do this." Jessie said, as she was beginning to cry.

"You hurt me. I trusted you and you let me down. How could you cheat on me? You know what? Don't you ever talk to me again. We are done and so am I! Goodbye, Jessie St. James." She said before she ran towards the bathroom, trying to get threw the large crowd of people that were watching them.

When she got home that night, she grabbed Mr. Cuddles and cried into him the whole entire night. From that moment, Rachel swore off boys for the rest of her high school career. She vowed to focus on nothing but her dying desire to become a Broadway actress like her all time favorite star, Barbra Streisand. So, when she got into her sophomore year, she was pretty excited when Mr. Schue formed the glee club.

But, what Rachel didn't expect was that Finn Hudson, the same Finn Hudson who she was madly in love with her whole middle school career, would be her fellow male lead in the club. She remembered the first time that he actually noticed her. They were about to perform Grease's song "You're the one that I want" for Mr. Schue. She heard him sing, and just like that she was wrapped back up in his spell. She felt exactly the same as she did in the eight grade. Throwing her paper on the ground, she walked over to him, and began pulling him back and forth as they sang together. She smiled brightly up at him, as he looked at her like she was going to kill him. When Mercedes interrupted them, she looked up at him as though he was some sort of god.

When she finally got the pleasure of speaking to him, she just babbled on. Rachel actually kind of regretted everything she said to him in that line for the concessions.

"You're very talented." she started.

"Really?" he asked.

"Yeah. I would know. I'm very talented too." she answered. "I think the rest of the team expects us to become an item. You the hot male lead and me the stunning young ingénue everyone roots for."

"Well, I uh, have a girlfriend." he replied, shattering her hopes.

"Really.. Who?" she asked curiously.

"Quinn Fabray." he answered her question.

"Of coarse." she mumbled under her breath.

"Huh?" he asked.

"She's a nice girl." she smiled up at him.

"Yeah. We've been going on for almost two years now." he announced proudly.

"Congrats!" she exclaimed.

"Yeah, now I wonder if they have sour patch kids." he said walking up in line.

From their everything went north for Finn and Rachel. Mr. Schue gave them most of the duets in class, they would say hi to each other in the hallways every now and then. At this point, he even knew her name. She was so happy that he noticed her now. The only thing that kept her worried was the fact that he was still in a relationship with Quinn Fabray, who was now the queen of high school. She was president of the celibacy club, and she was the captain of the cheerios. She also replaced Santana Lopez as queen bitch of the school. Quinn was the one who now picked on Rachel, Santana stood in the back and every now and then added mean comments. But other than that, Rachel could say that Finn was becoming one of her friends.

One day, he invited her to practice for glee club in the auditorium one day after school. When he got there, she was already at the piano, waiting for him so they could get started.

Hitting on a note on the piano, she spoke.

"Try it."

He then sang the same note.

"Good."

"That was good." he smiled.

"Okay one more up." she said before she hit the note above the last one as he sang the matching tone.

"That was really good." she smiled.

"Was that okay?" he asked, unsure of it.

"Yeah, it's like the holy grail for a barite nor, so it's a good note. All right, I'll start at the bottom and then we'll go up higher." she explained.

"Can we take a break? Singing kind of makes me a little hungry." he interrupted.

"Yeah, sure." She said pointing to the little picnic she had set up. "Well, lucky I prepared for that."

"Wow, I was wondering what that was all about." he said, sounding amazed.

"Want to sit?" she asked him.

"Yeah, yeah. Absolutely." he smiled walking over to it.

"I was wondering why you asked me to help you with your singing." she began as she followed him, and sat down too. "You kicked butt at the assembly."

"Well, this is my only chance to be, you know, good like you." he said looking at her.

"You think i'm good?" she asked taking out cups of the basket, with a surprised look on her face.

"Well, when I first joined, I thought you were kind of insane. I mean, you talk a lot more than you should, and to be honest with you, I looked under the bed and made sure that you weren't hanging out under there." he explained looking at her hurt face. "But then I heard you sing. I don't know how to say this but you touched something in me. Right here." he explained holding his left hand to the right side of his chest.

Smiling she corrected him. "Your hearts on the other side of your chest." she explained grabbing his hand and placing it on the right side.

"Oh. It's beating really hard." he chuckled. "You're cool, Rachel." he said smiling at her.

"Do you want a drink?" she said, distracting herself from the moment they just shared.

"Yeah." he replied.

"Virgin cosmos." she told him.

"Cool." he smiled.

She laughed as she poured the liquid in the two cups.

"That stuff you said at the Celibacy Club, that was really cool." he said as he grabbed a cup from her hand. "Thanks."

"Well, cheers." she smiled, after holding up her cup.

"The cups are like the airplane cups." he said as she took a sip from her drink.

"Oh, you got a little Cosmo right.. here." he said wiping it away from her lip as she looked at him. Looking at each other for a few minutes, Rachel finally broke the silence.

"You know, you can kiss me if you want to."

"I want to." he replied.

Laying her on her back, Finn lay on top of her, and kissed her passionately.

Abruptly stopping, Rachel looked up, confused as he had a weird look on his face. He quickly jumped up.

"Did I do something wrong?" she asked him, worried.

"No, no. Um... I just got to go." he explained, as he held his shirt over his pants. "Look, please don't tell anybody about this, okay?" he asked before walking away quickly, leaving Rachel broken hearted.

From that moment things only went south for the two, a few weeks after they both found out that Quinn was pregnant with Finn's baby. This news only hurt Rachel even more, because after that kiss they shared, Rachel finally believed that there was hope between them two.

"I know about Quinn." Rachel walked up to Finn with her arms crossed.

"Look, I should've told you." he explained.

"I am such an idiot. Hoping for something that'll never happen. I can't believe I let you talk me into coming back to the glee club." she said.

"I'm sorry, Rachel. But, I needed you in the club. I need this musical scholarship for the baby." he explained.

"Whatever." she said, as she walked away.

A few weeks later, Rachel found out some pretty shocking news. Rachel found out that Quinn's baby wasn't for Finn, but for Puck. She had to tell him. So, when she did tell him, he quit the glee club, and came back at the last minute.

From there, Rachel and Finn began their relationship. They dated all through the rest of their sophomore year, and to the middle of their junior year, before Rachel got mad at Finn one day and kissed Puck, causing them to end their relationship. After their breakup, Finn went back to Quinn, which left Rachel on her own and even more heart broken than she was before. When Finn and Quinn finally broke up at the end of Junior year, Rachel and Finn got back together at the beginning of their senior year.

When senior year was almost over, Finn did the unexpected. She got a text, for her to meet him at the auditorium for a very important meeting. When she got their, the stage was set up like it was when they shared their first kiss, and their was a stool set up in the middle of the stage. He directed her to sit on the stool. After giving her a very long speech about how much she meant to him, he got down on his knee, and pulled out a little black box. Opening it in front of her, it revealed a very beautiful diamond engagement ring. He asked her to marry him, and she couldn't say anything else but yes. Crying, he placed the ring on her left finger and kissed her.

After getting approval from Shelby, they scheduled their wedding.

Their wedding was very beautiful. Their wedding took place on a beautiful little area by a farm. The aisle was a long white linen made of silk, there were light pink flowers scattered around it, they had white chairs evenly displayed on both sides of the aisle, and the alter center, was above the ground, and covered in pink flowers too.

When they left their wedding scene, they flew to the Caribbean to enjoy their honeymoon. The beach was beautiful, but most of the time, they never left their hotel room.

Smiling at all of the precious memories that floated into her mind, she flipped another pancake on the stove, while humming her favorite tune. When she was finished, she fixed up both of the plates in smiley faces, and set them out for the two boys. After she walked over to the window, and watered the lily she had planted for her mother.

Going up the stairs, she found the two boys still fast asleep. Walking over to Finn's side of the bed, she knelt down and kissed him on the lips passionately. Before she could get up, he wrapped his arms around her, and started kissing her back.

"Best way to wake up in the morning." he smiled, with his eyes half open. "If only Jamie wasn't here right now."

"You'd be really lucky, wouldn't you?" she smiled. "Speaking of the little man, how is he? Any complains?"

"That child hasn't even stirred yet. He's conked out. Better check make sure he's not dead." Finn said, joking.

"Jamie, honey." Rachel whispered, trying to wake him up. "How is Jimmy Jam feeling today?" she asked as he opened his eyes slowly.

"I want my mommy." he said, as he began to start whimpering.

"I know, buddy. I'm gonna go call her okay? Finn can you check his temp. and give him more medicine?" she asked as she walked out of the room.

"Okay, buddy. Come see, uncle Finnie's gonna bring you downstairs." Finn said, as he picked up Jamie and walked out of the room, and downstairs.

Grabbing the thermometer from downstairs, Finn took Jamie's temperature. When the thermometer beeped, it read 100. Finn sighed as he still had a fever. Going into the kitchen, Finn grabbed the Tylenol, and poured the right dosage into the medicine cup and gave it to Jamie.

"Here you go buddy." he said as he handed it to Jamie, who gulped it down.

Walking into the kitchen, he found Rachel dialing a number into the telephone. when she saw him, she began to speak.

"I'm gonna call Haley to come get him. The food's on the table if you're hungry." she smiled as she waited for the ring to stop.

"Hello?" Haley answered.

"Hey." Rachel replied.

"Hey, I was just about to call you. Is everything going okay with Jamie?" she asked.

"Well, don't freak out. He caught the flu last night." she explained.

"What? Is he okay?" she asked sounding concerned.

"He's doing fine. He just has a small fever. We gave him some medicine. He's laying down right now, but he keeps saying he wants to come home, so that's why i'm calling you." she explained.

"Say no more. I'll be there within 15 minutes." she said.

"okay." she answered before they both hung up.

"She'll be here in 15 minutes to pick him up." she told Finn, who was listening to her conversation.

"Okay." answered Finn, as he munched down on his pancakes.

Walking into the living room, she walked over to Jamie, who was laying on the couch watching a basketball game.

"Hey, buddy. I just spoke with your momma. She's gonna be here in a few minutes. Do you wanna start getting dressed?" she asked.

"No. I wanna stay like this." he whispered.

"Okay, sweetie. Rachie's gonna get your stuff together, okay?" she said before she went upstairs and gathered all of his clothes into his small suitcase, before she went downstairs with his things.

"Okay." she said, putting his things by the door. "Look's like momma's here buddy." she said looking at the car pulling in through the window.

After another few seconds, Rachel heard the knock on the door, revealing a worried looking Haley behind it. She walked right past Rachel, straight to Jamie. Picking him up from the couch, she felt his forehead.

"Thank you for watching him." Haley smiled. "I'm glad he's okay."

"It's no problem. He's gonna be just fine." she smiled at the sleeping child.

"See you guys later." Haley said as Rachel noticed Finn walking behind her.

"See yah." Rachel said, and with that Haley was out the door.

"Phew... What a night.." she said, placing her hands on her hips. "Let's just hope we don't catch it..."

"I know right." Finn agreed.

"I had fun last night." she smiled, wrapping her arms around Finn.

"Me too.." he closed his eyes and held her tight.

"You know.. The fun doesn't have to end right now..." She smiled, looking up at Finn.

"Oh, really?" he asked, giving her a smirk.

Laughing, she playfully pushed him away and made a head start at running upstairs, with Finn chasing her closely behind.

"I'm gonna get you!" he shouted, while closing the door behind him to their bedroom.

**A month later**

Frantically running around the house, Finn couldn't find his favorite t-shirt that he wore on game days to school. He looked in the drawer, in the laundry room, under the bed, etc. He couldn't find it anywhere, and they only had half an hour before they both had to leave for work. He was now walking around the house, in his jogging pants, Nike shoes, with no shirt on.

"Rach, have you seen my game day t-shirt?!" he yelled so she could hear him from upstairs.

"Umm... I don't know did you check the basket in the utility room?" she asked, not really paying attention to the conversation.

"I already checked there.. Where else do you think it might be?" he yelled back, but got no answer.

"Rach?" he asked, still no answer.

Walking up the stairs to their bedroom, he opened the crack in the bathroom door, to find Rachel standing by the sink, looking in the mirror, as tears fell from her face.

"Hey, what's wrong? Why are you crying?" he asked walking towards her.

"These aren't sad tears, Finn. They're happy tears." she smiled and turned towards the counter to pick something up. Opening his hands, she placed in it a white stick.

Looking at her with a surprised look on his face, she smiled and spoke.

"We're pregnant."

* * *

**I really hope that everyone enjoyed this chapter. The next chapter will be the final chapter for this story. But don't worry, I'll try to make it really good. Please Review! Thanks. :)**


	12. Chapter 12

**Chapter 12**

* * *

The day was Thursday, November 24th. It was early in the morning and all of the leaves were turned brown from the previous fall season. It was particularly cold on that day, but not too cold to bare. The sky was it's bluest shade ever seen, the sun was as shiny as a million diamonds, and there wasn't a cloud in sight. There was also a lot of peace. The only things that could be heard we're the birds chirping in the trees, and the many cars pulling up and parking themselves in Finn and Rachel's driveway. The ironic thing about was that Finn and Rachel weren't even present.

Once everyone got inside, they went around the house making small talk with friends they haven't seen or family members that they wanted to catch up with. The guests in the house were a small number of Rachel and Finn's family and friends. There were Quinn and Sam, with their son, Mason, Tina and Mike, Artie, Brittany, Puck, Mercedes, Mr. Schue and Ms. Pillsbury, Burt and Carol, Blaine, Amy, her husband Jeremy, and their daughter Callie, Haley, Nathan, Jamie, Brooke, Julian, and their sons Jude and Davis, Peyton and Lucas, with their daughter Sawyer, and last but not least, the mastermind behind this whole entire gathering, Kurt. He had called everyone a few weeks before this day, to get an estimated date that they could meet, and invited everyone over to give Rachel and Finn a surprise welcome home party.

They were all asked to arrive at around 8:00 am when Kurt got the news that morning. Kurt and Blaine rushed over to the empty house to get ready to decorate before anyone got there. When all of the guest started to arrive, Kurt told them that they had to be quiet in case of suspicious neighbors. Someone was also hired to drive. All of their cars to the public parking lot on their street, so that when Finn and Rachel got home they wouldn't know something was up with a million cars in their driveway.

It took about 3 and a half hours before it was 11:33 am and someone notified everyone else that their car had just pulled into their driveway. Panicking, Kurt turned off the lights and told everyone to hide. When the front door was unlocked, Finn was the first to walk into the door, and place his keys onto the table by the door. Turning on the light in the house, Finn was a bit confused with the decorations. About to turn and go help Rachel, Kurt jumped up and exclaimed "Surprise!" Before being followed by everyone else. Seeing them jump up, Finn almost had a heart attack.

"Hey guys! What are y'all doing here?" He asked pleasantly surprised.

"Never mind that. Where is... It?" Kurt asked looking behind Finn.

"It?" Finn asked looking at Kurt with a funny face.

"You know what I mean." Kurt replied with his arms crossed.

Turning to outside of the door, Finn started speaking. "Hey, Rach! We have guests."

"Okay, we're coming!" she called back from outside.

Closing the door to the car, Rachel held the small frame in her arms and slowly made her way to the front door where Finn was waiting for her. When she walked into the house, she was kind of taken aback by how many people there were in her house, but she placed a smile on her face as they all gasped and whispered many things when they saw her and what was in her arms.

"Omg, Omg! Rach, I knew it! Blaine, you owe me 50 bucks!" Kurt whispered, as he was so excited.

"You bet money on our baby?" Rachel asked Kurt.

"Maybe..." He said backing up.

Turning to Finn, Rachel began to speak, "The things we come home to.."

"I'm just so glad! I don't know what I would've done if you two came home with a boy. Now that it's a girl, I can take her shopping with me all of the time! This is going to be so great!" Kurt said.

"Rach, she looks so cute." Quinn said walking over to her and the baby.

"Thanks." She smiled as Quinn gave her a quick hug and took a few minutes to look at the small sleeping baby.

"Look at our little sis, Ames. She now has her own baby." Haley smiled as they both walked up to them.

"She's so small, Rach!" Amy smiled as she played with the tiny hand sticking out of the pink blanket from the hospital.

"5 pounds and 8 ounces to be exact." Finn smiled, looking down at his daughter. " How about we get you a seat on the couch Rach? You gave birth yesterday and you look exhausted." Finn said, directing Rachel over to the couch, next to Carol, with Haley, Amy, Tina, Quinn, and Mercedes sitting across from her.

"She's gorgeous, Rachel." Carol said, looking at the small baby. "She looks like you."

"I would have to disagree on that." Rachel chuckled. "She's an exact replica of Finn." She said, smiling down at her sleeping child.

"She has your nose." Finn said, leaning against the back of the couch, where Rachel was sitting.

"Yeah." Rachel smiled, "I feel bad for her."

"Are you kidding? That's my favorite part about her." Finn replied.

"What's her name?" Asked Mercedes.

"That's the question I've been waiting for." Rachel grinned. "Her name is Shelby Grace Hudson." Rachel smiled as she rubbed her hand against the side of her sleeping daughter.

"You named her after mom?" Haley asked wiping away a few tears.

"Yeah. Is that okay?" She asked, looking worried as Haley was crying.

"No. It's perfect!" She smiled.

As the day went on, Rachel allowed many people to carefully hold Shelby for a short amount of time. By the end of it, Rachel went upstairs and placed her baby in her crib and went back downstairs to socialize with all of her friends and family. She got into the kitchen and her eyes began to light up. Since she was still feeling the affects of the cravings from her pregnancy, Rachel got so happy at any food she saw. Which, in this case she was delighted when she saw all of the food in her kitchen. Grabbing a plate, Rachel started fixing it, when she was accompanied by Brooke, who had a sincere look on her face.

"Hey, Brooke!" Rachel smiled.

"Hey, Rachel. Do you think we can talk?" She asked, with a sad look on her face.

"Sure." She smiled, pointing to the table.

"Okay." Brooke replied and followed Rachel to the table.

"What's up?" She asked looking at Brooke.

"I just really want to apologize for what I said to you that day at school and for calling you stupid. If I would've known that what I said would've caused you to do what you did, I wouldn't of said it. I'm just so sorry, Rachel." She explained.

"You don't have to be sorry, Brooke. You were just trying to help me by saying those things. You were right, I shouldn't have yelled at Jamie like that. And Brooke, don't think that you caused my situation. I was just in a really bad place with myself at the time. You don't have to apologize. If anyone has to apologize, it's me."

"So, are we good?" She asked looking at Rachel with a small smile.

"Better than good B. Davis. Come here." She smiled as she pulled her in for a hug.

"Thanks, Rach. By the way, I really admire how you chose to honor your mother through your daughter. Also, if that little girl isn't the cutest little girl in the whole entire world, then I don't know who is." Brooke laughed as Rachel joined her."

"Thanks. Am I the only one who think she looks exactly like Finn?" She asked out of curiosity.

"definitely not. She's his spitting image. She looks like the girl version of him. Well with your nose, of course." Brooke laughed.

"My baby's gonna be teased the rest of her life, isn't she?" She asked with a fake frown on her face.

"There's always the luxury of a nose job." Brooke replied.

"Never. Barbra will be her inspiration, like she is mine." Rachel told her.

"Okay, crazy momma. You need some rest." Brooke laughed again.

"It feels weird to hear that. Momma. It feels good. I'm a mom, Brooke!" Rachel smiled.

"let's see how good it'll feel tonight at 3:30 am. Good luck!" She exclaimed, before returning to the party.

Rachel dumped out her plate in the garbage and began to walk towards the living room, where everyone else. Smiling to herself, she really couldn't deny that she had the best group of family and friends. She was glad that Kurt had called them over to see her and her new baby. Rachel was glad that after all of these years, the whole entire glee club could still be a part of her family. Well, maybe not the whole entire needed to fix that.

By the time the clock had struck 2:00 in the afternoon, the whole party seemed to clear out, leaving Finn and Rachel alone in their house, with a sleeping baby girl upstairs and a big mess to clean up from their previous guests.

"You know, Kurt goes out of his way to throw these big surprise parties. Would it kill him to go out of his way to clean up the result of his parties?" Rachel asked, laughing.

"What can we do? He's a busy guy. He's probably already planning a shopping date with our newborn daughter." Finn replied, laughing as well.

"Look how far we've come." Rachel smiled, putting down the garbage bag and walking over to Finn to give him a hug.

"I know." He smiled

"I couldn't have done any of this without you." She said, looking up at him.

"That's not true. I don't know if you know this or not, but you're one of the strongest people I know, Rach. We're not her right now because of me. We're here, happy and in love, just as much as we were in high school because of your strength and courage." He smiled, then bent down and kissed her.

Before she could really kiss him back, the baby monitor on the coffee table started to played their daughter's crying through the room, causing the both of them to go upstairs. Getting into her room, Finn picked Shelby up out of her crib and took a seat in the rocker. Motioning towards the bottles, Rachel knew that Finn was telling her that Shelby needed a bottle, and by the smell of things, a diaper change as well.

Coming up from the kitchen, Rachel placed the bottle in Finn's hands as he was finishing with the baby's diaper change. Sitting on the rocker again, Finn placed the bottle in Shelby's mouth, and began rocking back and forth. Looking at Rachel, he noticed how fascinated she looked while watching.

"There's a notebook downstairs if you want to take notes." Finn joked.

"I'm sorry. It's just that you're so good with her. How do you know so much about babies?" She asked sitting down next to him, on the small couch they also placed in the room.

The room was actually quite pretty to Rachel. She was proud at the outcome of the design. At the beginning of her pregnancy, Finn and Rachel vowed that they wouldn't tell anyone the sex of the baby until she was born. When they found out, Rachel was quite surprised when Finn looked happy. She had thought that Finn would want a boy, like Jamie, to hang out with and play sports with. When she asked him how he felt about having a girl, he replied with some guys can't even get one girl, I now get two. Ever since that moment, Finn would always happily tag along as they shopped for baby girl things, such as clothes, blankets, bottles, etc.

During her pregnancy, Rachel became impatient with the secret of what her baby was. When people would ask her, she would always reply "We want it to be a surprise" no matter how much they insisted for more information. The only thing that kept her sane was the decoration of her daughter's room. Rachel was one of those parents who liked everything to be sorted out early in the pregnancy, so once she found out it was a girl, she headed straight to the local department store, and bought the paint. Rachel felt that pink was too normal for a girl's room. She wanted her daughter to be different and unique, so she bought lavender paint for her daughter's room.

Once the room was painted, her and Finn spent time trying to trace little pink and blue butterflies along the wall, which surrounded a huge print that they placed on the wall. It was a quote that Rachel had used when she was teenager. "Being a part of something special makes you special" love mommy and daddy.

Once she was finished with the walls, and they were all dry, she began to place the furniture around the room. She had a diaper changing section, at the top of it, it said change the stinky to clean and squeaky. Then on the other side of the room, Rachel placed her daughter's crib along the wall. On top of her crib, it said close your eyes and sleep tight, open them to the sunlight.

On the other side of the room, in one of the corners, Rachel and Finn had set up a small play area for when she got older, but other than that, there was a rocking chair and a small living room area at the other corner of the room, where they could sit or sleep or rock her to sleep. Last but not least, Rachel had her favorite quote painted on the white door, "hello, gorgeous" which was from Barbra Streisand. At the end of it all, Rachel was very impressed with how good her daughter's room turned out.

When she asked her question, Finn kind of looked embarrassed. He then replied.

"Well, you know when the whole thing with Quinn went down in high school, I thought I was gonna be a dad, so I wanted to prepare as best as I could.." He stopped looking down, he didn't want to tell her.

"What is it?" She asked, looking at him in a concerned way.

Sighing, he replied. "I went to Walmart and bought a baby doll and some diapers, and a bottle to practice at home." He quietly said.

Without saying anything else, Finn nervously looked at Rachel to see her expression. Her face was straight for a second before she burst end into laughter, which was what Finn didn't want.

"I'm sorry, it's just that... You bought a baby doll?!" She continued laughing.

"I was inexperienced." He replied.

"You could've asked your mom." She smiled.

"That would've been really weird. I don't know why you're laughing, I bet you played with baby dolls too." He said with a serious face.

"Yes, Finn, I did. But I wasn't a teenage boy, I was a young girl. Omg did they have little girls in the aisle when you bought it? What did the cashier say? Omg I wish I would've been there." She laughed.

"For your information, I used the self check out, and no, it was during the primary school's hours, so no little kids were there." He replied.

"You still bought a baby doll though. Do you still have it?" She asked, laughing.

"No, I threw it away the minute I found out about her and Puck." Finn said.

With that, Rachel's face went straight as she saw the pain in his eyes. Getting on her knees next to him, she looked up at him and began to speak.

"Hey, look, I know I've been making fun of the fact that you bought the baby doll, but I'm so sorry with what you had to go through with, how hurt you were. But, hey, look at us now, if you would've never found out, you wouldn't be here right now, holding our beautiful Shelby Grace, who looks exactly like her handsome father, with her mother's huge beak right in the middle." She chuckled.

"I love her nose, and yours. It's what makes you both beautiful. And you're right. If you wouldn't have told me about them, I would be stuck with Quinn, caring for someone else's child. I also wouldn't be able to be living the amazing life that we've built together. I love you more than anything, Rach."

"I know, because I love you even more." She smiled, resting her head on his shoulder as they watched their daughter look up at them.

"She's not going back to sleep, is she?" Rachel asked, as she took the small hand in hers and gently waved in around.

"Not anytime soon." He laughed.

"Do you think you'll be okay for her for a while?"

"Yeah, why?" He asked, as she got up.

"I have to go fix things with someone." She smiled. "I'll tell you all about it when I get home, I promise."

"Okay, be careful." He said as she nodded her head, and walked out of the room.

Getting in her car, she thanked Mercedes for telling her exactly where this person would be, because she really wouldn't travel all the way to New York.

Pulling up at the town's only recording studio, Rachel took a deep breath, got out of her car, and walked towards the entrance. Once she got in, she saw exactly who she wanted to see. Watching, the girl was singing some song that was unfamiliar to Rachel, but she sounded good. Once the song was finished, Rachel walked up to the glass box, and clapped, getting the girl's attention.

Putting the headphones on the stand, the girl walked out of the glass box, and walked past Rachel, rolling her eyes.

"Santana, wait!" She Called, running after her, she didn't stop. "Could you maybe slow down, I had a baby yesterday, and I'm not really in shape at the moment." Rachel called out to Santana who stopped and turned around to face her.

"What do you want Berry? I got people to see, and places to be. It's not like you would know anything about that!" She said before she rolled her eyes again, and turned to walk away.

"Wait!" She called again, causing her to turn around again. "I want to apologize to you."

"Apologize? For what? You didn't slap me hard enough or something?" She asked crossing her arms over her chest.

"I shouldn't have slapped you at all, or yelled at you." She let out.

"Whatever. Just leave them in the studio, cause it doesn't mean anything to me." She said before turning to walk away again.

"Fine. At least I tried, right?" She called out, and began to walk away, before Santana stopped her.

"Fine, tell me what you have to tell me, just, not here. Follow me." She said as she walked towards a set of stairs, with Rachel following.

Once they got to the roof top, Santana sat at a bench, and looked at Rachel who looked around in amazement.

"Hey, dwarf, we don't have all night. Speak." She said with an unamused face, and her arms still crossed.

"Okay, look, I shouldn't said those things to you that night at Burt and Carol's. My mother had just died and I was on edge, anything could've set me off, even Kurt's happy mood. For some reason it was you. I guess I was just holding some resentment from high school. I never really understood why you made it your life's mission to make my life the worst it could be, Santana. I understood that you were popular and on top of the high school social pyramid, but none of the mattered to me. All I wanted in high school was to be your friend. I even sometimes envy you, you know." She said looking at Santana.

"How could you possibly envy me? You're the one who has Finn." She asked, looking at Rachel.

"Finn? That's what this is all about?" She asked looking at Santana.

"I don't know, Rachel. In middle school I honestly didn't like you because you didn't have the pressure on you like I had on me. You're parents weren't pushing you to try out for every sport at the school, or to make the highest grades in the class, which were made by you, and you weren't pushed to keep your reputation at it's highest. And yes, I envy you because of Finn. From the time I took his virginity in sophomore year, I guess I liked the way he made me feel. Did you know when we did it, he offered to buy me a cheeseburger?" She said.

"Okay, I didn't need to know that, but, Santana, you're way better than that. You could've asked me for help instead of making me cry everyday." She replied.

"I know. Can I tell you a secret, Rachel?" She asked.

"Anything." Rachel answered back.

"I was never in love with Finn." She said.

"But you just said.." Rachel didn't finish before Santana spoke again.

"I lied. From the time I was in the sixth grade, I knew I liked girls.. I mean, I did use Finn for my beard in the seventh grade, but there's only one person that I've been in love with all of this time. Brittany Pierce." She said, looking out at the street lights of Lima at night.

"Why don't you tell her how you feel?" Rachel asked, as she saw the tears roll down her eyes.

"I guess I'm just too scared. I mean, what if I tell her and she tells everyone that I'm lesbian, or worse, what if she doesn't feel the same way?" She asked, as she cried.

"You'll never know until you try, Santana. Even if she doesn't feel the same way, I'm sure there's some girl out there who'll love you for exactly who you are." Rachel said, placing her hand on Santana's shoulder as she cried.

"I'm so sorry, Rachel. I shouldn't have picked on you all of those years. You would've made an amazing friend." Santana sobbed looking at Rachel.

"You can't fix the things from the past, Santana, but there's nothing stopping you from making a bright future. I forgive you. How about we start being friends now and make up for all of that lost time?" She asked, smiling at Santana.

"That would be nice." Santana smiled as she hugged Rachel. "So, this kid that you had yesterday, you have any pictures of it yet?" Santana asked, wiping away her tears.

"Oh, yeah. Here." She chuckled while finding the picture on her iPhone.

Looking at the picture, Santana put her hand to her heart and then spoke.

"She's so cute. Are you sure that's not Finn in there? She looks exactly like him." Santana smiled. "Oh,look, she even has your shnoz!"

"Yeah." Rachel replied.

"What's her name?" She asked, smiling at the picture of the sleeping baby.

"Shelby Grace Hudson." Rachel answered her, proud to say her name.

"Shelby. I like it. It's not all those long and weird names that people are using with their kids these days. Where'd you get it from?" She asked curiously.

"It was my mother's name." Rachel smiled, and then looked up.

"It's beautiful. Rachel, about that. I just wanted to say that I was sorry about those things I said at the dinner table that night. I knew that she had died, I was just playing my old games in which I really shouldn't have. I'm sorry that I made you say those things about your mom, I wish I could take it back." Santana said, looking at Rachel with sad eyes.

"It's okay, Santana. It's long gone in the past. Let's start fresh. Hi, my name is Rachel berry Hudson." She smiled, holding her hand out for Santana to shake.

Smiling, Santana smiled and took it, while speaking. "Hi, I'm Santana Lopez, and even though my name isn't as long as yours, it's one hell of a name." She said, while they both laughed.

"Santana Lopez, this is going to sound totally preschool, but would you like to be my friend?" She asked with a grin.

"I would love to, Rachel Berry Hudson." She laughed.

The spent almost, three more hours on that roof top talking, crying, laughing, and catching up on the friendship that they missed out on all of those years. By the time they left that rooftop, Santana had Rachel number in her phone, as did Rachel. When they both got into their cars and left, Rachel could say that Santana Lopez was now one of her best friends. She was glad that she had talked to Santana, because Rachel honestly needed a friend like her in her life.

When Rachel walked into the front door it was 10 o'clock. Walking into the living room, she found Finn sitting on the couch, watching a football game with Shelby fast asleep in his arms.

"You're training her already?" Rachel asked, placing her purse on the coffee table, and taking a seat on the couch next to Finn.

"Babe, she has to know her sports.." Finn smiled, kissing Rachel. "So, where've you been? Give me the detail, just as you promised." He laughed.

"I made a new friend.." She smiled to herself.

"Who?" He asked, curiously.

Taking out her phone, she pulled up the selfie that Santana and her had taken a few hours earlier. "Santana." She smiled, looking at Finn.

"I'm glad you two made up." Finn replied.

"Yeah, me too." She chuckled. "Okay, shel shel, i think it's time you make it to your bed for your very first night home." She smiled, as she slowly and gently placed Shelby in her arms and headed for up the stairs, as Finn turned off all of the lights and locked all of the windows and doors, and turned on the alarm system, before following Rachel up the stairs.

Placing Shelby in her crib, Rachel closed her eyes, and began to sing her a lullaby, just like her mother used to. But this time, she wanted to sing a new song for Shelby. She thought about when she was dancing around with Jamie in the pool, the Cinderella song she sang. She knew that would be the most perfect song to sing every night for her baby girl.

Right before she could start, Finn walked in, sat on the couch, and looked at her. "Sing it, momma." He said, smiling, waiting for her to continue.

_A dream is a wish your heart makes_

_when your fast asleep_

_in dreams you will lose your heartache_

_whatever you wish for, you keep_

_have faith in your dreams and someday_

_your rainbow will come smiling through_

_no matter how your heart is grieving_

_if you keep on believing _

_a dream that you wish will come true_

_a dream is a wish your heart makes_

_when you're feeling small_

_alone in the night you whisper_

_thinking no one can hear you at all_

_you wake with the morning sunlight_

_to find fortune that is smiling on you_

_don't let your heart be filled with sorrow_

_for all you know tomorrow_

_a dream that you wish will come true_

"Goodnight, baby girl." She smiled.

After Finn and Rachel left her room, they got ready for bed, and just lied in bed for a few more minutes before speaking to one another.

"Finn are you awake?" She asked the air, wondering if her would answer or not.

"No." He replied sarcastically, turning to face her.

"Real funny.." She rolled her eyes.

"I know, I should become a comedian huh?" He laughed.

"Can we talk?" She asked.

"Yeah. What's wrong, Rach?" He asked, looking at her serious face.

"I just wanted to apologize for the way I was the few know that I could never take your love for granted right? Because, I don't know what I would do If you thought that I could. When I look back on that girl, it gives me unpleasant shivers down my spine. Like, I'm not proud of who I was or what I did back then. The only good thing is that I didn't lose you, when I easily could've. You're the best thing that's ever happened to me and I love you to the moon and back times 1000. You're the love of my life Finn Hudson, and that's who you'll be for the rest of my life, because when I look into my future, I see us on the porch, watching our grandchildren run on the front lawn, like that dream you had." "You're my life."

"You don't have to apologize, angel. I know that you could never take me for granted, just as much as I could never take you for granted. I know how you feel, because honey, I feel for you twice as much. Before you came into my life I was this Lima loser jock who had no future. The only thing I had was my girlfriend and my football team. I always knew deep down in my heart that that wasn't enough to get by with. But, when stepped into that auditorium with a crazy short brunette who was pulling me back and forth at our first glee rehearsal, I knew that I had found my future. Even if Quinn was still by my side, I knew that I had found the love of my life, even if she made me check under the bed to see if she was under there. My high school life will always be my favorite time in my life. Not because I was popular, or because I was the captain of the football team, but because I met the love of my life, and because I was a part of an amazing club, which was considered my family, and because I actually graduated high school, which at the beginning of senior year, I didn't think that was possible. I also didn't think by the end of our senior year I would be at our wedding sight, saying vows to the woman that I know will be with for the rest of my life. Rachel, you're my life. I would not be where I am today, if I hadn't of me you. You've gave and are are continuing to give me the best life that any guy could ask for. You gave me this marriage, when you said yes, you gave me this house, when we signed the lease, and you gave me our beautiful daughter, when you sacrificed yourself through all of that pain, just so she could get here. I can't wait to live my dream with you, because baby you're the love of my life. Forever and always, Rachel Berry Hudson."

"Is there a way you could repeat that, so I can listen to it everyday?" She asked smiling bright, holding him, with her head against his chest.

"I might need a sip of water first." He joked, causing them both to laugh.

"You know I could never hate you right? I have no idea why I said it. I never meant it though. There isn't a day that I've ever spent in my whole entire life that I've spent hating you, and there never will be." She smiled.

"I know. I love you." He smiled, kissing the top of Rachel's head.

"I love you more." She smiled back.

"If you say so." He replied.

"Finn Hudson, your my life, and those few months taught me something." She told him.

"What did they teach you?" He asked looking down at her.

"You're my rock."

* * *

**So, here's my final chapter for this story. I really want to thank you all for reading my story, I really appreciate all of the reviews. There isn't one that I haven't already read. My next story, sadly, is not going to be based on the Glee fanfic world, but on the Vampire Diaries. So, if you're a fan of the Vampire Diaries, check it out. I may write some other glee fanfic later, but for now, I wanna focus on the Vampire Diaries one. The pairing is going to be Delena, so if you like them, read it. Thanks, guys! Hope you enjoyed the story! :)**


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